Journey to Ethiopia...again

Taye Day - One Year Ago

2010-04-01T21:17:00.005-04:00

One year ago today we met Taye. As I drove home from work, I looked in the rear view mirror at his reflection and said out loud, "wow...what a year".

The day we met!

Last week!

I am not sure which was longer the journey to bring him home or the journey to today.

Glad you are here, Taye...for so many reasons.

Thanksgiving Comeback Post

2009-11-25T14:51:00.008-05:00

We were on a "blog break". Apparently, posting was something too difficult to keep up with as we poised ourselves to make it through the days. However, now that Thanksgiving is upon us how could I not take a moment and share my thanks for everything that has happened in our lives since last Thanksgiving.

Almost one year ago we received the referral our little man, Sintayehu. He was appx 8 weeks at the time and we spent days staring at his pictures willing him home. We are so thankful for the hands that brought him to the orphanage, the caretakers who did their best with what they had to care for him and Alemu who worked on our behalf to connect our family.

Fast forward a few months to the day we discovered that Sintayehu was not getting formula. We are so thankful at the response we and others received to help kids who live over 7000 miles away get the nourishment they desperately need. Since that day, over 500 lbs of formula have been sent over with various travelers from people who answered our call for help.

When it was finally time to travel and bring him home, we couldn't be more thankful to our parents who made the long journey with us to help care for Mikias and see their grandson's birth country....a gift like no other.

When we were in country...we had the best day of our lives thus far! On the same day, we had the opportunity to reconnect with Mikias' African Mommy in the morning and meet Sintayehu for the first time in the afternoon. We are so thankful she was willing to meet with us, play with him and join me in holding our son. And....our new baby. There is nothing more authentic than picking up your child for the first time and having his head nestle in to your neck. I am thankful every day that he is our son.

And of course just 14 days after the best day of our lives, came the worst. We can't even begin to express our gratitude for the depth of support that surrounded us. We are so thankful for the quick medical responses of the ER team, the skillful hands of a surgeon and the hours of round the clock care in ICU. Not to mention, the levels of people who lifted Taye and our family and held us so close for many days. We could not have survived something like that alone. We are so thankful for the strength given by our family and friends.

It is difficult to find words to show graciousness for the last 8 months of recovery for Taye. His medical team, rehabilitation specialist, therapists, school therapists and advocates have played such an integral role in his journey. We are so thankful for the careful attention given to one little boy. To aid in this, we have had numerous people support us in being able to attend to his needs and his aggressive schedule. We are so grateful to our family and friends for the countless hours they helped in watching Mikias, making meals and overall attentiveness to Taye. Being able to celebrate with others as he overcame each obstacle was wonderful. Thank you.

We are so thankful for health. We watched Taye grow from his starting point of not being able to bear weight on his legs at 6.5 months old to walking across our room babbling after a serious accident. We are eternally grateful for his spirit and resiliency. This little fighter has taught me more than I thought I would ever know.

On a personal note, I can't help but be very thankful for Benjamin. My husband is a man with an unwavering commitment to us. He easily supported my new position which created more responsibility for him. He eagerly took a paternity leave, as we decided, when Taye came home. (Despite the fact he encountered bit of discrimination from a few people who have things to learn yet) Most importantly, he became Taye's #1 advocate and medical coordinator. His stamina through all these months (with nothing more than a grimace when he was laid off) reminds me daily of someone else I have to be thankful for.

As this year is almost all said and done, I realize I am most thankful for the clarity I have in life.

Three of the four people in our house are napping right now, laundry is not done, we still have a suitcase packed under our bed from Africa (no joke), piles of paper are stacked strategically around the house---but hey, the basement is almost finished.

I have never been happier.

Happy Thanksgiving!

A picnic & Taye's new trick

2009-07-14T22:37:00.006-04:00

We had an awesome time this past Saturday at a picnic at Kensington for adoptive Ethiopian families. Although we knew most of the people there, we were able to meet a few new people as well. We were undecided about going, but once we saw how well Taye was recovering we knew it wouldn't be a problem. It was a perfect afternoon and it was fun to see all the kids playing together. We're so fortunate to be connected to all these people.

Taye and his new friend Daniel

Mikias with Samson and Zachary

Mikias getting some help from Sofanit in the sack race

I also need to mention how impressive Taye is doing. Within the past couple days he's even got a few new tricks...most significantly sitting himself up. Now his method isn't the same one he's been working on at physical therapy, but it gets the job done. He's also just started clapping his hands together. We're so happy that's he's making these improvements considering where he was a couple months ago. Judging from this video Mikias is also very, very excited.

Home Again

2009-07-07T21:14:00.008-04:00

After being transferred to the pediatric floor this morning, we spent most of the day waiting for the neurosurgeon to come and give us the OK to go home. Everyone that came in a saw him said Taye looked great, but we needed the neurosurgeon to officially discharge us. Finally, around 5pm today Taye was discharged and we are now home!! It's hard to believe that just yesterday morning we ate breakfast here...a busy couple of days to be sure.

The rest of the week for us will be good. Joanna has time off work and the best part is no more doctors appointments or therapy appointments to go to for the rest of the week What a treat! Hopefully, this will give us some time to get back on track.

Taye sleeping post-op yesterday...with his big hat

Taye tonight at home showing off his interesting haircut

Moving along nicely

2009-07-07T08:59:00.003-04:00

As I'm writing this both Joanna and Taye are taking a morning nap. Last night was a bit restless, probably because Taye slept so much yesterday during the day. He didn't really sleep for a long time in a row last night...just 1 - 1.5 hours at a time. But that's OK because he seems to be doing really well. Yesterday afternoon he started back on his normal eating schedule and has been eating like normal ever since. He also doesn't seem to be in too much pain and has only been on Tylenol recently. I think most of his fussiness so far is just related to all the wires he has to contend with when he wants to move around.

So, it sounds like we'll definitely be leaving the ICU today to either go home or to the regular pediatric floor. We'll have a better idea once the doctor makes rounds today. I'm hoping for home myself just as long as they think his pain is under control and there are no signs of infection.

It's amazing to me that this has seemed so easy for us. Of course compared to April's stay this is much less urgent and, unfortunately, we have a comfort level with it now.

A familiar place

2009-07-06T15:14:00.003-04:00

Taye is now in ICU in the exact same room we were in back in April. It's kind of strange being here again, but there's also some comfort in knowing the people here and how everything works.

Taye was pretty fussy when Joanna and I first saw him in recovery. He was extremely hungry and sucked down a lot of water and a little formula. It seems he has some pain, but now he's drugged up so he's sleeping comfortably. We'll definitely have our hands full when he completely wakes up though. When he was awake earlier he was twisting himself in the IV and monitor cables and rolling over all over the place. Not sure what we'll do to contain him, but we'll figure something out.

One of the things the neurosurgeon was talking about earlier was how the skull piece that was reinserted was actually dead bone. Once the skull fuses itself back together after a few months that piece should come back to life...amazing! There's already been talk of us going home tomorrow depending on how well Taye is doing and how well all the systems are working. We'll see.

Surgery complete

2009-07-06T11:23:00.003-04:00

The neurosurgeon just came out to let us know that the surgery is done and everything went well. We haven't seen Taye yet...it sounds like he'll been in recovery for a little bit and then we'll head up to ICU. But, everything was successful and the bone was put in place. We're anxious to see him and are so happy that everything has gone smoothly so far.

Let's try this again

2009-07-05T22:44:00.007-04:00

After spending a fun weekend in Chicago for Irene's wedding (fun...except for several meltdowns by Mikias), we're now geared up for Taye's 2nd surgery tomorrow morning. I think we're all very anxious to get this over with. It seems like this had been lingering out there forever, so it will be good to get it behind us and to continue to move through the healing process.

It should all happen at 8am tomorrow morning and we're hoping that this time there won't be any delays. I feel so bad that Taye is sleeping so peacefully right completely oblivious to what awaits him in the morning. Please send your prayers his way.

We'll update when we can tomorrow.

Mikias jumping in Chicago

Taye's last mohawk pic before we "evened out" his hair tonight

Taye's new cut...too bad it will only last one day

By the way Taye's teeth hurt...but he has 1 now!

Meds and the Lake

2009-06-29T22:17:00.003-04:00

Last week, we ended up taking Taye back to the pediatrician because it seemed like he was working on an eye infection and we wanted to make sure we would have time to clear it up before surgery. The doctor wasn't sure if it was an infection or not...but we ended up with eye drops anyway just to be safe. Also, a slew of other things were found that wouldn't normally be a big deal...but they are since we're trying to avoid missing surgery again. So, as a result we're now giving Taye five different medications. This isn't ideal to us at all, but we're just trying to get that surgery to happen in a week and don't want to give them any reason to cancel it. And, of course, the eye thing hasn't cleared up so now we're off to an ophthalmologist tomorrow. My life is now completely consumed by all this nonsense.

This weekend, we spent four days up north with all of my family. My Grandpa's memorial service was on Friday and it was excellent. The rest of the time we spent up on Heart Lake. We stayed in the house next door (actually 12 of us did) and everyone else was in my grandparents house. It was a blast. The weather was perfect and we spent a lot of time down at the lake swimming...and working a bit too. At night we just hung out with everyone and talked. I can't think of something my Grandpa would have wanted more than to have the entire family up at the lake enjoying themselves.

My cousin Jessica getting ready for a boat ride w/ the kids

Taye's first swim in Heart Lake!

Mom & Aunt Jan w/ Taye

Enjoying coney dogs (one of Grandpa's favorites!)

Benjamin, Isaac, Dad, & Uncle Bob working on the beach

...and then a hot air balloon landed on our house

2009-06-23T10:47:00.004-04:00

This picture has not been altered in any way.

Well, maybe it didn't land on our house, but it certainly caused a lot of excitement in the neighborhood last night.

Back on

2009-06-19T10:07:00.002-04:00

We have a new date for Taye's surgery...July 6th. It kind of stinks that it is so far away again, but it does allow us to participate in other events (my grandpa's memorial service & a wedding in Chicago) over the next few weekends. It also helps that I don't have a date to return to work now, so we won't have to worry about that. We were already having discussions about what to do come August anyway.

Other than that, I'm now adjusting to having two kids with me all the time. We had still been sending Mikias to daycare a couple times a week, but that is now done for the summer. It would help if it stopped raining constantly. Mikias really, really needs to go outside and I'm running out of non-TV indoor entertainment options.

Things that make you go hmm....

2009-06-16T22:57:00.003-04:00

Well today is a new day!

Benjamin took Taye to the pediatrician. She said he is not congested. He is just Taye. So, we are now back to trying to schedule surgery. No details yet. Hmm....

Benjamin was also able to do what he needed to do to sign up for unemployment. So, he is now being paid to stay home. Not a bad gig! Hmmm....

I went back to work today as my teacher pals were off. As you can tell, this is a first for me. Hmm...

I don't feel like I am stressed, but the dentist told me last week I am grinding my teeth and I have a twitch in my eye that won't go away. Hmmm...

Thanks for all the phone calls and posts...we really are doing fine.....just find ourselves pondering often about recent events. Hmmm...

False start

2009-06-15T10:13:00.003-04:00

To say that today has not gone as planned is an understatement.

Joanna and I made sure Taye was fasting, we packed up for a hospital stay, we made it to the hospital on time and into the pre-op area....then things stalled. The anesthesiologist heard Taye's congestion (which he's had since we met him in April) and thought that he was coming down with a cold. We explained that he's had this checked out and everything has been OK. But, the doctor said he was being conservative and cancelled the surgery. He was concerned about him having an infection that would cause issues post-op. This is a little frustrating since I think that this is nothing...but we understand if it is a problem. Needless to say we now don't know when surgery is. We have to do some follow up w/ our pediatrician to resolve this and hopefully reschedule soon.

The most frustrating part is that my grandpa's memorial service was scheduled around this surgery so that we'd have time before we had to travel up north.

And, on my way home I got a call from my work and I am now laid off.

What a weird day...what a weird couple days.

Today and Tomorrow

2009-06-14T20:39:00.002-04:00

These past few days have been full of emotion. My grandpa, who has had Alzheimer's disease for many years now, has been dying for several days. He passed away this morning. Fortunately, we were able to spend some time with him during these days. In fact, yesterday we took the boys to see grandpa for one last time. Although all he was doing was sleeping, Mikias talked to him and held his hand. And then when we left my mom helped Mikias put the sign of the cross on grandpa's forehead.

I'll definitely miss my grandpa. Although the disease had already taken so much from him over the years, he remained as charming and personable as ever. So many of my fondest memories of my childhood involve the things grandpa, Peter, and I did. Luckily, I'll always have those memories and they will always be a part of me.

Grandma & Grandpa singing and dancing - Christmas 2006

Grandpa meets Mikias - June 2007

Of course, amidst all this, Taye is still scheduled for surgery at 8am tomorrow morning. Even though there shouldn't be any issues at all, it does still make us a bit anxious. The surgery will last around 2 hours and he'll likely be in ICU at least for tomorrow night. From the neurosurgeon's estimation he'll probably remain in the hospital for a few days. We pray that everything is routine and that this is the last time we'll stay in the hospital for a LONG time.

Hopefully, we'll post updates on here after surgery so everyone is in the loop.

Catching up

2009-06-11T20:32:00.009-04:00

I'm attempting to "catch up" here on several weeks of news and activities. Definitely the reason we haven't been on here much lately is that our schedule has been pretty packed with doctor appointments and the general craziness that revolves around managing two kids.

First of all, Taye continues to do exceptionally well. He had a follow-up CT scan a couple weeks ago to see how things looked and to determine if he's ready for the second surgery. The CT showed that he still had some accumulated fluid, but nothing to be concerned about. The brain swelling has definitely subsided and, as gross as it sounds, we can actually feel the edge of the hole in his skull when we feel that soft spot. Also, the brain mid-line continues to improve and get closer to center. As a result, the surgery is a "go" and is scheduled for Monday morning. This surgery will just replace the section of skull that was originally removed and possibly drain some of that excess fluid. The neurosurgeon indicated that we'll probably be in the hospital 2 - 3 days. The one thing that will be watched closely is whether an infection develops from reinserting the bone...even this is not likely though.

We've had a couple good doctor visits to some specialists. First we saw a physical medicine doctor who directs the physical / occupational therapy for Taye. She was extremely encouraged by what she saw. It seems that most of the gross motor skill issues we're dealing with in therapy are a result of Taye's stay in an orphanage and not necessarily from the injury. Of course there are some other things that are injury related too. Overall, she indicated that Taye would be in some sort of physical therapy until he's 2. But, again, she thinks that he's doing great and will not have long-term physical issues.

To supplement the PT/OT that we're currently doing through Beaumont, we also got hooked up with the Oxford schools and some of the services they offer. After thoroughly evaluating Taye and creating a big report on him, they determined that he is eligible to receive PT & OT through the schools here. The only thing is that they stop services for the summer, but in the fall he'll probably go to PT/OT here once a week. So we'll probably just use this to supplement what we're doing through Beaumont starting in September.

This week we saw the neurologist. This was another very encouraging visit. Since there haven't been any issues with seizures and since he's on such a low dose of the medication, Taye will likely be weened off those meds soon. The neurologist wanted to wait until after surgery to stop the medication, but she thinks that he'll do just fine.

In terms of Taye's new "tricks"...he has several. He's started babbling a lot....dadada, bababa, stuff like that. This is good news because a lot of times developmental delays show up in speech. Most importantly, Taye has started to drag himself across the floor...I'd like to say "crawl" or "skooch" but it's definitely a "drag". His right arm does all the work right now and he's very successful at getting where he wants to go. The physical therapist wants us to encourage him to use his left arm too, obviously, and he loudly protests when we intervene. We'll get there eventually, but this is a good start.

Probably Taye's most significant trick is weight gain. He's now up to 22 lbs....just 4 lbs lighter than Mikias. He gained 5 lbs. in 6 weeks after leaving the hospital. Looking back at some of the pictures from early April, we think he was definitely a bit malnourished when we got him and he's catching up now. He may be the "younger" brother, but I don't think he'll be the "little" brother for long.

Whew...I think that's all the Taye news.

As for Mikias...he's loving the warmer weather. He loves being outside and throws a fit when it's time to come in. I took him to the zoo a few weeks ago with a bunch of people from his daycare and we had an awesome time. Of course Mikias had so much fun and used up so much energy that he eventually fell asleep in the stroller.

It seems like recently Mikias has begun to talk constantly and I've noticed he has a very, very good memory. He puts pretty good sentences together too. And he talks a lot about Taye and to Taye. He seems very proud to be a big brother. Of course inevitably Mikias seems to bring up the hospital, but I think it's because he had such a fun time playing in the play area on the children's' floor.

Last weekend we went up north to the cottage. It was really, really nice to get away for a few days and very fun to be up on the lake. We didn't do much other than just sitting around and playing at the park...but it was just what we needed.

Joanna & Taye hiking at Bald Mountain park (Taye's 1st hike)

Benjamin & Mikias hiking too

Mikias' mad bike riding skills (note the helmet protecting for head injury!)

Benjamin & Mikias mowing the lawn (for 45 min...seriously!!)

Mikias & Taye chilling up north

Joanna & Mikias on Heart Lake

Taye & Papa up north

Mikias' gotcha day gift...Benjamin played with it more

Mikias' Gotcha Day!

2009-06-08T14:17:00.004-04:00

I know that we've got a million things to update on here with all the new developments, various doctors' appointments, and preparing for surgery. Needless to say, we've been extremely busy trying to balance our new normal.

But, we'll put all that aside for now, because today is a very, very important day for our family. It's Mikias' Gotcha Day! Two years ago today we met Mikias in Addis Ababa and he joined our family. We can't even imagine life without this awesome little guy. He has enriched our lives so much.

Happy Gotcha Day little man.

Benjamin, Joanna, & Mikias - June 8, 2007

Mikias - June 8, 2009

In his own words...

Our new normal...for the time being

2009-05-18T22:29:00.003-04:00

The past couple of weeks we have been settling in to our new way of doing things. I believe they call it...survival...yikes! All in all, things have been going well, but I won't lie and say that it hasn't been hard. We certainly did not anticipate how difficult it would be to juggle the number of doctors appointments and/or consultations we continue to have with Taye. Not too mention, the transition from one child to two.

I can sum that last sentence up in a phone call I received from Benjamin as I was driving home from work one day last week. I believe our conversation was "hey, you gotta hear this". When he held the phone up, to what I imagined to be an interesting scene, all I heard was one child screaming until he took a breath so the other would "outshine". Oh my! When I pulled in the driveway, I remember getting out of the car, taking a deep breath and diving into the role that meets me as soon as I walk in. (what happened to that transition time after work....or a nap?)

Benjamin has been playing the "stay at home dad" role as determined prior to completing the adoption. When we made this decision prior to the adoption, I know he was excited as I was fortunate in being able to take the first leave with Mikias. With my new job of working until 4:30, he certainly got more than originally bargained for. Although I know it must be difficult, Benjamin is doing amazing.

His "new normal"...Monday-home both boys. Tuesday- home with both boys & then PT/OT afternoon Wednesday- Mikias at daycare with the tumblesbus while every other week an ultrasound or CT Scan for Taye... leading up to surgery. Thursday- Mikias at daycare while Benjamin takes Taye to PT/OT followed by the ever relaxing Friday of being home with both boys. Last week was my first full week back at work and by Friday night we both were exhausted. But, hey....we are not complaining. We have a good thing going on over here with nightly walks (sometimes to the park) in which I can't think of any other place to be in the world.

Taye continues to keep us smiling. I have to admit that when people ask me how he is doing, I would love to say very confidently "good". I find myself so guarded and protective of him as I still feel like we walk on uncharted territory. His PT sessions go well. He is definitely gaining strength in his mid-section as we only need to allow him a "lean" for sitting. This is an improvement. He more comfortably rolls over on both sides (including the "skull-less" side). OT has been more difficult as he falls asleep often and struggles a bit with attending to things. We are in process of identifying if he may have a "sensory processing disorder".

His daily routine is improving as we are actually able to get him down for a nap and his night sleep has longer intervals. He certainly continues to eat like a champ. His latest endeavor was sweet potatoes! We take all of this as a sign that he is attaching to us and starting to feel more comfortable.

Last week his ultrasound indicated that the fluid found on his brain noted in the last CT scan is still there, but not growing. It looks like we are still on track to have his surgery June 15th. I would say my favorite growth seen thus far, is that he appears to recognize his name "Taye". It kind of feels like he is healing and growing into this new name. Certainly, Sintayehu (his middle name) will always hold a place for us, but Taye certainly has a nice ring to it...especially when he looks over and smiles.

Lately, we have been setting up follow-up appointments with various entities. We have a follow up appt later in the summer for his eyes, a neurology appt early June to determine a plan for the current seizure medication he is on, and this Wednesday is the evaluation for "early on" services offered through the school district. For the latter, he will have a whole team of early-on educators to determine what, if any, services to provide to ensure the earliest intervention possible in preparation for school. Honestly, the idea of an IEP for my 8 month old scares me, but the fact that this is even possible is extraordinary. At very least, we will have very complete record of his progression. Honestly, I think he deserves all this attention. He is making up for his first 6 months. Besides the fact, he is super cute and you just want to love on him all the time.

We also have a date set for our "welcome home" visit from the adoption agency. I almost forgot we had something to do to officially complete our adoption. I am pretty sure this was already to have taken place, but our agency has been great with giving us space. The US Gov't...well, not so great as his green card arrived with his name spelled SintayeMu.

Overall, Taye, aka... Sintayehu , SintayeMu or our little miracle still reminds us daily how much we have to be thankful for. That feeling is still so fresh...

When life gives you an uneven haircut...

2009-05-12T10:13:00.003-04:00

...make a mohawk!!

Actually, the saying has something to do with lemons & lemonade...but it's the same idea. We've been thinking about doing this since Taye's surgery and we finally did it. There was no way we were going to completely lose the long curls since they were one of our favorite features. Since he'll get shaved on the one side again for his surgery in June, we thought Taye should try a mohawk for a while.

Mother's Day

2009-05-10T12:21:00.003-04:00

Happy Mother's Day Joanna! I couldn't ask for a better mommy to our two little boys. I know this has been a trying month, but you continue to do a fantastic job raising our sons.

Thank you

2009-05-06T22:36:00.001-04:00

There are a zillion of people we want to thank for helping us through the last few weeks. All the people that have made their way into our lives have helped tremendously.

So, thank you to:

Our parents who have been by our side every step of the way...they were with us every frightening moment in the hospital and have helped every single day since. They spent nights in the hospital with us, allowed us to take breaks, and have been unbelievably supportive at every turn.

Our siblings and their families. Especially Caroline (for helping w/ Mikias and opening her house to everyone), Peter (for driving from Grand Rapids and spending a night in the hospital), Stephen (for driving in from NC, his copious note-taking, overnight hospital stays and fantastic babysitting skills) and Alison (for flying in from TX to spend time with us in the hospital)

The amazing staff at Troy Beaumont emergency room. Once the problem was identified, the entire ER seemed to spring into action to help with Taye. The coordination it took to start working on Taye, set up the helicopter transport, and coordinate w/ the surgeons was amazing.

Dr. Zakalik, the neurosurgeon at Royal Oak Beaumont. His expertise and experience was much needed and led to an extremely successful surgery. All of his comments and reassurances since have also eased our minds.

Every single doctor and nurse in the pediatric ICU. In previous experience w/ hospitals, I've never come across a group so dedicated, skilled, and compassionate as these people are. Everyone could be relied on at any time and they always made us feel informed and comfortable in the week we spent there.

The boys' pediatrician, Dr. Sampath. She came to the hospital immediately following the surgery and called us every single day we were in the hospital. She was in constant contact with the doctors at Beaumont and was able to re-explain some things to us.

All the specialists that have played a role in Taye's treatment and recovery so far - ophthalmologists, neurologists, physical & occupational therapists. We are impressed with everyone we encounter and their ability to evaluate and apply treatment to an infant.

Every visitor we had in the hospital...from long-time friends to people we've never met. Any distraction we could get from constantly staring at ventilators and monitors was very helpful.

Those that brought us food. Several people brought us food in the hospital (I mean you can only survive on the cafeteria for so long). Since we've been home, several neighbors have also brought meals to us.

Robin (Mikias' daycare) for helping to keep Mikias' schedule as normal as possible through all of this. It helped Joanna and I to know that Mikias was in a familiar environment playing with his friends as usual.

Everyone else that helped watch Mikias, pick up Mikias, feed Mikias, bring Mikias to the hospital, and stay the night at our house with Mikias. Again, knowing he was in good hands took a load off our minds.

People that sent us cards, emails, voicemails, text messages, and posted messages on this blog. Just knowing the number of people that supported us and were thinking of us helped a ton. We actually kept our computer on in the hospital room and would constantly read all the new messages.

All that prayed for us and added Taye's name to prayer lists. I get the impression that Taye was prayed for in various places all over the country...that's powerful stuff.

Everyone that hasn't met Taye (yet) but have still included him and our family in their thoughts. It's amazing to us how automatically this little boy from across the world was welcomed to our family.

There's probably some person or group I'm accidentally forgetting, but please know that our family so deeply appreciates all that everyone has done for us.

A week at a time

2009-05-03T14:57:00.004-04:00

We have decided that if we take each week at a time, it is easier to digest than looking much further than that. A "week" is certainly a graduation from the original "minute by minute", "hour by hour" and "day by day" basis from the accident. Additionally, much of our conversations still surround the "wait and see" approach, which certainly can't happen on an hour by hour basis.

Anyhow, this past week was full of specialist type appointments and arrangements. We have started to call this phase two of the recovery and healing process. We learned a lot this week and have been in the process of continuing to set up supplementary services and appointments.

Tuesday we met with a pediatric opthamologist who was fantastic. Although difficult to dialate eyes as dark as Taye's, the doctors were able to see enough to make some conclusions. First, both his eyes are working and seeing. The retinal hemorrhages we were concerned about before appear to be outside the center field of vision, which is a good thing. The only noticeable issue is the fact that Taye has lost a field of vision as he looks to the right. Essentially he doesn't have peripheral vision on his right side. The doctor did say we have to "wait and see" if this returns and then went on to tell us how the body tries to compensate for this. Very interesting.

Wednesday morning, Taye had a CT Scan and MRI. He had to be sedated for both of these, so we were back to not eating, trying to soothe without food and waiting room time. However, we did have an appointment with the Neurosurgeon later that afternoon and were able to see the results. The CT Scan of his brain shows the swelling has started to subside as noted by the clearer or more defined portion of the brain which has the damage. The neurosurgeon went over the picture with us and showed us which portion of the brain relates to the functioning within Taye's body. Again, very interesting. He did note that there was some fluid (not blood) on the brain, but indicated he wasn't concerned.

The MRI was ordered as a result of the skeletal survey within the hospital. Taye seems to have a missing or very small disk between his L4 and L5 vertebrae. We are looking into if this is congenital or if, by chance, he had spinal tuberculous or ----itis (can't remember the name).

Anyhow, the conversation with the neurosurgeon was very good. He did indicate to us that in his 20 some years of practice, he hasn't often seen a bleed as large as Taye's was with the result that we have. He said, "he's a lucky guy". I think we are more than lucky. As we were leaving, the office staff told us about the day of the accident through their eyes. Essentially, rather abruptly, both receptionists were on 2 phones, while our surgeon was also fielding calls and pages to coordinate the emergency surgery. At one point, they heard the helicopter over head to which our surgeon said "there's my baby". I am glad that Taye is his baby too!

Thursday we had both his initial and evaluative physical and occupational therapy appointments. We were very impressed with the pediatric facility and professionalism shown by the staff. We start PT and OT twice a week from here on out. I think Taye will benefit greatly from this! It is weird because there is starting to become a blend of where his "delayed skills" are coming from. Certainly, the effects of the accident are there, but we've also had many conversations about his environmental upbringing in the orphanage. Either way, we are in the right place for this.

Friday we spent the day setting up follow up appointments with Taye's neurologist, rehabilitation specialist and began the first steps to applying for the early on program for more PT/OT at the home. The biggest date nailed down is June 15th, which is the scheduled surgery date to replace the skeletal bone flap missing. It feels good to have a target date.

Overall, we have started to settle in to our "new normal". We had some big things happen around here this week as Mikias held Taye for the first time. He also was very helpful in giving Taye his pacifier and even assisted me in feeding him one day. I think he is catching on this big brother idea. Best of all, we have been able to go on walks outside and have recently not had anyone sleeping in Taye's room with him. We are all taking baby steps....just one week at a time.

8 x 2

2009-04-27T22:03:00.004-04:00

One month ago today we departed on an 8-day journey to Ethiopia to pick up our son. Four days ago we arrived home after another 8-day "journey" with our new son through the most difficult days of our lives. Of course, neither of these journeys will ever be over for us and they will definitely be something that define our family forever. I wouldn't expect to ever experience a month for the rest of my life that would have such dramatic highs and lows. We feel so fortunate to be looking back over the past couple weeks knowing that Taye continues to make amazing strides. Coming back to our house on Thursday kind of felt like a "do-over" of our arrival with him on April 4th. I almost forgot that we had him in our house with us for 11 days before heading to the hospital.

Now that we've begun to digest the situation a bit more, we've been able to reflect a bit on the last couple weeks. Of course, most of our reflection seems to lead us back to April 15th. We've discussed how the timing of everything seemed to lead us to the best possible outcome imaginable on that day. From our decision of when to go to the pediatrician and when to go to ER, to the amazing coordination it took to get Taye the hospital he needed to be immediately. Any one of these things could have gone differently and very bad for us...and it's hard not to dwell on that...but we are grateful beyond words with how everything was handled.

As for Taye right now, he continues to do well. We're obviously a bit paranoid about the large soft spot that now exists on the side of his head, but it doesn't seem to phase him too much. He's been on the ground rolling over and only a few times has it been painful for him. We're getting more comfortable with handling him, but we're very aware when Mikias gets near him because there's that fear that he will fall on him or play too rough. So far so good! There was some concern that he would have anxiety about being upright and would feel off balance because of the brain shift, but he hasn't been bothered at all. What a trooper this kid is! Joanna commented that he is the strongest person she knows...and he's only 7-months old.

It seems now that we're starting to deal with some of the things we were working on a few weeks ago again...getting on a good eating/sleeping schedule, finding ways to comfort and soothe him, etc. There are so many considerations with attachment and bonding that were (obviously) thrown out the window while we were in the hospital, so we've been making an effort in that area too.

This week is extremely busy. We had an appointment with the pediatrician on Saturday. Tomorrow we see the ophthalmologist to re-check areas of concern in his eyes. On Wednesday Taye gets a follow-up CT scan and an MRI (with anesthesia) and then sees the neurosurgeon in the afternoon. I think his stitches will be removed this day too. Then on Thursday begins regular PT and OT appointments...these will start as twice per week and may be increased. Needless to say, Joanna is off from work all this week. Hopefully, we can gauge from all these appointments what our schedule will be and work from there.

I'll work on getting some more pictures of the boys up here so everyone can see how good Taye is doing. We continue to need your prayers as we travel through the recovery process and come to terms with the trauma we experienced. I know that coming so close to losing our little boy has been a drain on us mentally, physically, and emotionally, but every day has been better than the one before. And it's hard not to feel hope and happiness for the future when Taye flashes us one of his big smiles!

Shh...Taye's sleeping

2009-04-23T21:46:00.004-04:00

....at home.

Moving forward...and moving rooms

2009-04-22T22:50:00.002-04:00

As of this morning, Taye is officially out of ICU and in the regular pediatric area here at Beaumont! Last night, Taye slept great (lucky Joanna). This morning, the resident doctor came in and said that Taye would be moving and the move was already done by the time I arrived at the hospital around 10:30. So, all of the things we've accumulated during the past week in his room had to be moved just a short distance down the hall. Needless to say, we're thrilled.

Also this morning the neurosurgeon (who had done Taye's surgery) did an evaluation and thought he was doing great. In fact, it sounds like we may actually be heading home within the next couple of days should things continue to positively progress. Taye will have to come back in a month or so (depending on his progress) to have the portion of skull reinserted. That will mean more surgery, but we're very pleased to have this surgeon on Taye's case...he is excellent. And he's been genuinely interested in our story, even to the point of having public relations at Beaumont talk to us about our experiences. In fact, they're coming in the morning to interview us.

Taye continued to do great today. He had a couple of "appointments" today with the physical therapist and occupational therapist. We were able to discuss with them what to do when we go home and what to concentrate on to help Taye regain strength and control. They were incredibly helpful. They had him sitting up in a chair (something we'll continue to work on with him) and he actually seemed to enjoy it. Because of his injury and the subsequent brain shift, being upright can be scary for him because he constantly feels off balance. It's relieving to see him continue to do little things that he did before the accident...his nonstop motorboat sounds, shaking his head, etc. I really missed those little things in him during the past week. And, of course, he continues to smile at us and we love that!

This afternoon, on the recommendation of the neurosurgeon, we took Taye for a wagon ride around the halls and out to the children's play area here. He seemed so stimulated looking at all the new "scenery". His eye movement is getting really good and that was very obvious during the ride.

This evening in our daily talk with our pediatrician, we discussed a few things that needed to be done / looked at before heading home. Joanna and I still need to achieve a better comfort level with a few things, but overall we're ready to head home and begin the next stage of Taye's recovery. Tonight my dad and I are at the hospital. Hopefully, things go as smoothly as they did last night. But, even if I'm awake all night there's consolation in the fact we may not have too many more nights in the hospital.

Tuesday...

2009-04-21T21:45:00.010-04:00

When we first started this blog, never did I think we would use it for support surrounding a long hospital stay with one of our children. It certainly has become an instrument for recording the daily happenings, a therapeutic release and an online support network.

Benjamin and I have worked out a routine where one of us stays with another family member through the night here at the hospital with Taye, and the other with Mikias somewhere. So far, this routine appears to be working and reminds me daily that our family is our rock. Last night I slept in my own bed for the first time since the accident, and it kind of felt like a sign that we are moving past "something" to return to "something" more like what we had imagined when landing in Detroit just 17 days ago. I have to admit that I can't wait for the first time all four of us are able to sleep in our home again.

In any event, today was quieter than yesterday's entourage of doctor "appointments". Taye had a difficult night of sleep. Perhaps, I should say Benjamin had a difficult night of sleep as Taye just wanted to play for a few hours in the middle of the night. Fortunately, one of his grandma's was here to help with that. Anyhow, the morning was a bit difficult as Taye had to stop eating by 4am to be ready for sedation so some "eye doctors" could take some pictures of his eyes. Somehow during all of this, Taye's IV leaked and had to be changed which was an unexpected hiccup to the morning.

The eye pictures revealed that he has some retina hemorrhaging in both eyes. We are still getting answers to what this means, but this revelation did prompt a full body x-ray to determine if there were other such bleeds or breaks in the rest of his body. Unfortunately, this also prompted the child advocacy representative to come to us for conversation. Certainly, she was following protocol, but let's just say this was not our favorite part of the day. At some other point, this will be a great topic to post about. Now, is not that time. (Okay, maybe just one thing...if there was only a child advocate for 4.8 million Ethiopian orphans...)

Interestingly enough through the aforementioned full body x-ray, along with blood and urine tests, we may actually start to piece together a medical history for Taye. Doctors are certainly trying to understand why such a small incident caused such a large problem. We are trying to eliminate the idea of any predispositions or simply recognize something that would be helpful as Taye continues to grow and develop. Honestly, at very least, it would be nice to speculate some answers. As an added bonus, we might be able to get a closer indication of his actual age as we currently are working on an estimate. Lousy way to find out, but information nonetheless.

Anyhow, the rest of the day was lower key. PT (physical therapy) did come in and continue their evaluation of Taye. He is doing so well. He is starting to feel more comfortable in the upright position, which is an improvement. It did appear that he attempted to roll his body and his head didn't appear as "heavy on his shoulders".

Our goals for the day were for him to 1) keep his formula down despite a small sedation - which he did, and 2) have a "Happy Time" awake, which he did on more than one occasion...so much so that goal #3 of sleeping for 2.5 hours straight is just only now in process. It's 10:22 and if we make it to 10:50 we are "3 for 3!" Overall, it has been a good day!

Things around here are starting to lighten up. We smile (especially when Taye does-and yes we do say smile now!). We joke about stupid hospital things and we certainly hug Taye and Mikias a little tighter. Even though it would be better to not be in this position, small steps each day make us thankful for all that we have been given.

Doctors....Doctors....Doctors!

2009-04-20T16:47:00.002-04:00

Today has been an extremely busy day after a night with a bit of an interuption due to difficulty sleeping. At the moment, Taye is sound asleep after a full day of doctors.

The Schedule as it played out:

8 AM - PT evaluation
9:15 AM - CT Scan
9:40 Doctor's Rounds on PICU floor
10:20 Neurology Rounds
10:45 EEG Begins
12:00 EEG Ended
1:00 - OT evaluation
1:30 - First Opthamalogist Evaluation
3:15 Neorosurgeon Evaluation
4:30 Second Opthamologist Evaluation

Overall, Taye has done amazing. He made it through the CT scan this morning without anethesia, which was huge. The results indicated larger swelling than the last which has been explained to us as "to be expected". It did indicate more clearly that he did suffer a stroke (which has been the lack of bloodflow we have been talking about) and we have been exploring the effects throughout the rest of his "appointments" today.

We still feel encouraged by what all of the doctors have been saying. Even as new therapists and doctors enter the picture, the tone set still remains as rehabilitative. Our best conversations come from the neurosurgeon who is optimistic in his progression. He is the doctor who removed the hematoma so we feel he has had the birds eye view. It does appear that whenever we are finished with this hospital stint, we will go home before having the second surgery to replace the portion of his skull temporarily removed.

We still have a "road" ahead of us mostly being created by the numerous hands laid upon Taye today....but we are happy to be on that road.

Shh...Babies Healing

2009-04-19T22:39:00.002-04:00

The title of this post is perhaps my favorite sign that I pass regularly as I walk around the intensive care unit. The word healing brings so much hope and we have been told repeatedly that when Taye is sleeping, he is healing. In fact, his heart rate has recently dropped into the 120's when he sleeps (which is a good thing as he is relaxed). When he was first admitted, we had moments where 208 would flash on the screen and of course bells would go off. In any event, when Taye sleeps, he is healing and I think we are too.

Honestly, Wednesday is a day I would like to forget. I do feel after we get to a place where we are comfortable with our seemingly new normal for the moment, we will have to heal with the difficutly of Wednesday. But, for now, we focus on our "day to day" and the strides that appear to be made on a small scale each day.

Last night Benjamin (and my brother) stayed the night with Taye. He awoke for feedings and then went back to sleep with relative ease. When I arrived this morning, Benjamin was rocking Taye and they both looked quite content. My first feeding with Taye resulted with interaction that included Taye grabbing for my hair and even a small smirk. Others may call it a smile, but for protective reasons, I think Benjamin and I prefer to call it a smirk until we are assured that both corners of his lips do in fact reach upward. In any event, the interaction which clearly included eye movement and some small reaction to us stimulating him, resulted in all of us tearing up. This was indeed our small baby step for today.

We have had numerous family and friends bounce in and out of our room during the past few days. Those who have come by for a second time, comment on his progress, which is very encouraging. His eye movement was noticably different today. Additionally, towards the later part of his afternoon, Taye clearly lifted his right leg. His right big toe now holds the coveted "glowing red-oxygen marker", so we speculated the light was attracting to him, therefore encouraging movement. It certainly is attractive to Mikias as he reaches into Taye's bed to touch his toe. Today, Mikias held Taye's hand. So sweet.

Mikias has been doing really well. He has been staying with my sister for most of the days. He loves it as he is able to play with his cousins. Today he had a visit to the fire station with his Uncle Rick, so his day was great. Just recently understanding the transition from one child to two, Benjamin and I have been pretty sensitive to Mikias during this time. Fortunately for us, we have a huge support of people who have been able to ensure that Mikias spends time with each of us each day both in and out of the hospital. I do have to put a plug in here for the hosptial children's garden/play area. This massive room has allowed us to spend some valuable time with Mikias while feeling only a moment away from Taye.

Overall, today was a good day. We decided to write the goals on the board today after he did them. As Jill pointed out, it gives us that good feeling when you write something on a list and are able to check it off. So today, he moved his eyes more, had a small smirk, reached for things often and lifted his right leg more than once. CHECK!

Tomorrow morning Taye has a CT scan with a long EEG later in the day. We anticipate tomorrow to be a bit busier than the weekend in terms of tests and follow up, but also hope for additional small moments of baby steps towards healing for all of us...but especially our little Taye Sintayehu McKinney.

Let is be known, how much we appreciate the many thoughts, prayers and support that we feel as we move through our days.

Saturday's steps forward

2009-04-18T23:21:00.003-04:00

Today we made a little more progress. Taye slept great through the night, partly because of the new seizure meds he's on. At around 5:30 he woke up and seemed hungry so I gave him 2oz of formula and then another 2oz an hour later. Since he was able to hold that down with no problem, we were able to feed him fairly regularly throughout the day. Also, today was his noisiest day by far. He has found his voice again and by the time Joanna arrived this morning he was voicing his displeasure for everything happening to him. It was actually good to hear him wail a little bit. The entire day basically consisted of him eating, fussing, and sleeping. He's been a little hard to get to sleep now but it seems like he prefers to be rocked in the rocking chair...so that's what we've been doing.

Taye had visits from a couple doctors today and some brief evaluations. Things were a lot quieter since it is the weekend. The doctors continue to be encouraged by his progress. We're still looking at some issues with motor skills in his right leg. But, we accomplished the two goals we had for the day: 1. Keep food down and 2. Move more. Hopefully tomorrow will bring some more tiny steps forward.

Ups and Downs

2009-04-17T23:17:00.002-04:00

I definitely feel that today required a lot of stamina as it was full of ups and downs. While the morning and portions of the day provided good signs, with a good removal of Taye's breathing tube, the afternoon and evening provided some challenges.

For most of the day, Taye's breathing remained steady and calm. Every so often he would begin to become agitated and would move around a bit. Even though it is difficult to see his grimacing face, it was selfishly helpful to see his body move. It was noticeable today that his left side of his body is the stronger side, however his right arm was pretty active today as well.

We both were able to hold him today, which was awesome! We had the opportunity to try and feed him as well. It was a little strange because he had difficulty taking the bottle. He wasn't able to suck with ease, but somehow he ended up taking 4.5 ounces. However, a few hours later he woke up abruptly and threw the majority of it up. A small setback. We were reassured that this happens and we (mostly me) needs to keep remembering he is recovering from a trauma and a surgery.

In any event, the high point of the day is that, at one point, Taye had his eyes open and appeared to be seeing and hearing our voices. He struggles to look to the right side, but he certainly had some movement that was reassuring. He even moved his right leg up at one point, which was the first time it had moved in awhile.

The hardest point of the day was around 9pm, when Taye experienced a seizure that dropped his oxygen level. It is alarming to have everything seem status quo and in an instant, need to be attending to something.

The day has been long. I have needed many reassuring conversations with nurses, practitioners, residents and doctors. The staff has been amazing and have been very helpful in answering many of our questions and addressing concerns. The tone set by all has been hopeful with a recognition that time is needed to determine more things and set a course of action.

Thank you again to all the thoughts and prayers that have been sent in our direction. We greatly appreciate all the visitors and support from family and friends.

A good morning

2009-04-17T13:10:00.003-04:00

This morning Taye was taken off the ventilator and he seems to be doing well. They stepped him down gradually and then completely removed his tube and he's been breathing on his own ever since. Since that major tube is now not in the way, Joanna was able to hold him. This made us feel so much better and he looks so much better without that ugly tube in his mouth.

Also, we had a brief visit from the neurologist this morning. He was encouraged by Taye's progress. His right arm has been moving a lot so that's a good sign. In a little while we'll try to feed him with a bottle. The medical staff here doesn't think the feeding tube will be necessary and that he can take the bottle right away.

More news to come as we work through all this. Thanks for all of your messages and comments. They help more than you could ever imagine.

Please pray for our little boy

2009-04-16T16:19:00.003-04:00

I'm not sure how many people the news about Taye has reached so far. We've done our best to call as many people as we can but this blog is the best way to reach everyone.

Yesterday morning, while I was watching Taye at home he accidentally rolled off our bed and hit his head on the carpeted floor. After some drowsiness and throwing up I took him to our pediatrician. He checked out normal and was very alert and happy while we were at the doctor. After returning home, things seemed to take a turn for the worse. He continuously fell asleep and woke only to throw up. We then took him to the emergency room at Troy Beaumont Hospital thinking that we were dealing with a concussion. After some initial tests checked out normal, they recommended a CT scan...immediately after the test everything changed. The doctors came urgently into our room and told us there was a huge emergency. The CT scan showed a large hematoma (blood leak) in Taye's brain. They gave us a very, very grim outlook for him. They immediately went to intubate him and indicated that he needed brain surgery as soon as possible. Unfortunately, there was no neurosurgeon at that hospital. They ordered a medevac helicopter to transport him to Royal Oak Beaumont. This was the worst feeling Joanna and I have had in our entire lives. As we waited for the helicopter and prayed over Taye, my dad baptized him in the ER. Then he was whisked away in the helicopter, while we followed in a vehicle.

By the time we arrived here, he was already in surgery. After about an hour, they came and said that they successfully drained the blood and found the source of the bleed. He's been on a ventilator and sedation meds ever since. It was a long night for Joanna and I to say the least. This morning, another CT scan showed that the brain (which had been very compressed by the blood) was back to a more normal size. Also, it showed some areas of the brain which may have been damaged. There are some good signs though...he's moving his arms and legs (the left side more than the right), he does have a cough and gag reflex and his kidneys seem to be working properly.

The hematoma was large enough to significantly push the left side of his brain and shift everything. We just found out tonight that there was some damage to the left side of his brain as a result of this pressure and shift. It's just way too early to tell exactly what this means. The initial indication is that there will be some lagging motor skills on his right side.

Tomorrow is a big day as they will be removing the breathing tube from Taye to see if he can breathe on his own. We're optimistic that this will go well. Through this entire ordeal he has shown a lot of fight and spunk. Tomorrow will probably be a rough day since Taye will be more awake and aware of what is going on and will be pretty agitated. But, it will be good if we can get another tube removed from his body (today he had two removed - a drain tube from his skull and a urine catheter).

As for the cause of this, it's been called by most doctors a "fluke". There is no way that a small fall like that on to a padded surface should have done this. It appears that the fall caused a small fracture in Taye's skull exactly at the point an artery was inside. The artery was nicked and caused the bleeding.

If you're hearing about this for the first time here, this story may seem unbelievable and surreal...Joanna and I felt exactly the same way as we were in the middle of the chaos yesterday. Right now we'll continue to need all the prayers we can get. Prayer has got us a long way in the past couple days and we feel blessed that we've made it this far. The road ahead will likely be long but we continue to hope for positive results.

A Family of Four

2009-04-14T15:50:00.013-04:00

Since arriving home, we have slowly been unpacking and enjoying our newest family member immensely. Much of our family has been over to spend some time getting to know Taye. This has been so much fun. Taye is doing remarkably well in his first weeks with us and since arriving to Michigan. I can only imagine what must have been going through his little mind, as we take him on this long airplane trip to come home to this house where this little kid who looks like him only bigger and faster is running a terror. Yes, Mikias acknowledges that he has a little brother and can be very sweet with him. However, at points, it appears to be in the form of running a matchbox car across his body.

While Mikias views Taye as a mountainous terrain for his trucks, we are viewing Taye as already climbing mountains. When we first met him, we noticed right away that his development appeared to be a little "behind". Clearly, he had little strength in his lower body and his head often would flip backward to investigate the ceiling. He did have the ability to roll over right away and would pop his head right up. In a very short time, he is already holding his head a bit firmer and seems to understand how to place a little support on his legs. We have created a plan for his eating as well. After talking with our pediatrician, we feel confident that Taye will continue to grow and develop into his own version of that toddler running around our living room.

At some point, we would live to revisit a few photos and stories from our trip abroad, but in the meantime are settling into being a family of four.

Here are few pictures from Taye's time with us so far...

What is snow?

Silly faces with cousins...

While Mom and Dad took my new brother to the doctor, Uncle Steve let me eat snow!

I love my cereal!

More cousins...

Happy Easter!

Great-Grandpa

2009-04-07T09:26:00.000-04:00

A few months ago, when it came time for Joanna and I to choose a date in September to be Sintayehu's birthday, we chose the 17th. The number 17 was significant to us because Joanna's grandma died on this past July 17th (it was also her birthday).

Before leaving for Ethiopia a couple weeks ago, Joanna's grandpa became increasingly ill. As we arrived at the airport in Detroit this past Saturday, we learned from our family that grandpa had passed away just moments before. Maybe he was waiting for us to be safely home before passing.

We hope that Taye will have a special connection to these fantastic great-grandparents that he never met. And we know that grandma and grandpa love our new little boy and our entire family very much. We'll miss you grandpa.

Grandpa and Mikias - July 2008

We're home

2009-04-05T17:49:00.006-04:00

We arrived home safely yesterday afternoon. What a whirlwind of activity starting with our Friday in Ethiopia...

Friday morning we all (with the exception of the boys and Mom Karwan) went to the Merkato to do some shopping, but mostly just to experience the atmosphere of the largest market in Africa. Joanna and I had spent quite a long time here with Alemu in '07, and we were anxious to show our parents what it was all about. This time we had two guards escort us through the market because of safety concerns...makes you wonder how unsafe we were in '07...oh well. Overall it was a good trip. We only stopped at one vendor to purchase baskets, but we took advantage of it.

Following lunch we had to concentrate on packing our things. We had stuff strewn all over our room and needed to get it all under control. In the afternoon, we had a traditional coffee ceremony at the lodge that Alemu had arranged. Luckily, he brought along Gizesh who we had met in '07. She was able to see Mikias and we were able to visit a little bit despite the language barrier. We also were able to see Getachew, the man who does much of the court and embassy work on behalf of AAI in Ethiopia. We got to know him quite well in '07 and we were glad that we had a few minutes to catch up. Again, it was great that we were able to make these connections with people we had met before. It makes us feel more connected with Ethiopia that we have people there that remember us and whom we consider friends.

After dinner, the entire group loaded up and made our way to the airport. I'm sure we were quite a sight with all of our luggage and kids navigating our way through the ticket counters and baggage screenings. Our flight was delayed leaving Addis, so we had a little more time than we would have liked sitting in the airport. We finally took off around 11:30pm to begin the long, long trip home. The plane ride was brutal and seemed to take much longer than our trip there. There wasn't a great opportunity to get any significant amount of sleep since we were now dealing with both Mikias and Taye. Taye started eating much more than we planned for and we got worried that we'd run out of formula before we got home. It turned out all right. He was also agitated and had some trouble sleeping. There was a certain spot on the airplane by the doors where he would fall asleep. So, Joanna and I spent a long time standing up there with him trying to get him to sleep. After 17 hours in the air we finally arrived in DC completely exhausted. But the fun had just begun.

Since we were late arriving, we had even less time to go through customs, collect our baggage, go through immigration, re-check our bags, get our boarding passes, go through security, and get to our gate. The baggage took forever. I think they must have had one guy unloading the whole plane because it was so slow. By the time we hit immigration, we were getting a little worried that we wouldn't make it. We tried to send Mikias with our parents ahead to get through the gates but that didn't work since he wasn't on their itinerary. So that left Joanna and I with the two boys and a ton of luggage. By the time we hit security we were literally running through the airport. But, we made it!!

We arrived in Detroit on time and were greeted by many family and friends. How good it felt to be home after that travel experience. There were several families at the airport that we've gotten to know through the Ethiopian adoption process. It was great to see all the Ethiopian kids there to greet their newest friend.

Check out this video of our arrival at the airport. At the beginning, you'll see some of the other families that we traveled with arriving too. Thanks so much to the Kubiks for putting this together so quickly!

Last night, Joanna's sister, Caroline, helped us out a ton. She stayed with us and helped with the boys through the night and did a zillion loads of laundry. It helped tremendously to have her here. Thanks Caroline! Other than that, since we've been home we've just been trying to settle into a routine with sleeping, eating, etc. I'm sure it will take a while to get readjusted.

Embassy Day

2009-04-02T17:17:00.001-04:00

Last night, Sintayehu was very, very easy. He slept great. We fed him before we went to bed and then only once in the middle of the night. I woke up at 7:30 and looked over to his crib to find him just lying there contently. I told him that he could make some noise to let us know he's awake. Actually, we were a little concerned that we hadn't heard him cry yet, but he has cried a few times today so we're feeling better. Sintayehu has been a pretty easy baby so far. We're making an effort to get him in a sitting position to build some strength he's lacking, but overall he's good. He's been eating like crazy and has easily finished off 8oz bottles every time we feed him. We've also given him cereal a couple times.

Today was much more laid back than yesterday, but we were still able to fit a good amount of activites in. This morning we gave Sintayehu his first bath in our sink here. He didn't mind it too much, but it wasn't the easiest process even with the additional hands we had to help out. Following the bath, Joanna, Mom Karwan, & Dad McKinney went to do some additional shopping near the same location we shopped a few days ago. Joanna was able to pick up quite a lot of great items that we'll be stuffing in to our suitcases. Meanwhile, Mom McKinney, Dad Karwan, and I spent the morning running a daycare out of our room here at the Sadula Lodge. Actually, two of the three children here were mine, but we also took care of Jim and Dawn's new son as they went out to grab some last minute souvenirs. Actually, everything went really well. Joanna returned just in time to handle an extremely messy diaper…perfect timing!

After all the shoppers returned, we all gathered with our new children to make the trip to the US Embassy here in Addis to submit paperwork for the children's entrance visas. This was a pretty boring, long process. It was kind of like sitting in a Secretary of State's office for two hours…not a lot to do. There were many, many families with adopted children at the embassy and they were all there for the same purpose. Finally, after two hours our name was called and we were able to pass through the interview quickly. This was the last step in getting the adoption finalized so that Sintayehu can enter the US on Saturday when we land in DC. Tomorrrow, Alemu will go and pick up Sintayehu's packet and passport from the embassy and we should be good to go.

This evening, our friend Hiwot stopped by the lodge to pay us a visit. Hiwot was the cook that worked at Alemu's house when we were here in '07. Joanna has stayed in contact with her and she agreed to visit us. So, we had a nice conversation with her and her aunt in the dark (the power was temporarily out). We're hoping to make a few more connections like this tomorrow before we leave. Hopefully, we can swing it.

Tomorrow should be a good last day in Ethiopia. In the morning some of us will head to the Mercato to do some shopping/sightseeing. Also, there is a traditional coffee ceremony planned for us in the afternoon. Other than that, we'll be busy packing and prepping for the long flight home. It's hard to believe that we've been here nearly a week.

One last thing…Joanna and I will be spelling Sintayehu's new first name Taye. The pronunciation will still be "taa-yeh" or "tie-yeh" but the spelling is different than I originally posted. The spelling without the h seems to be the Ethiopian way, so that's how we're doing it. We're a little concerned that in the US it will be pronounced "tay", but we'll deal with it as it comes. Of course we don't have to do any official name change until after we're in the US…so we could change our minds and go with something like George…but he really doesn't look like a George to us.

What a Day

2009-04-01T17:50:00.001-04:00

Today has definitely been one of the most full, emotional days we've ever had. What an experience it was. The day began with Alemu picking us up around 8am for our trip to Debre Zeit. An hour later, we arrived at the orphanage for a meeting with Mikias' birthmother. Right when she saw us she showered us with hugs and kisses and was genuinely happy to see all of us…especially Mikias. We spent quite a while at the orphanage talking, playing, and looking at a picture album we gave. We were able to take tons of pictures and video of the meeting that will definitely be valuable in the years to come. Then we learned that all of us were going to get a drink at a local café/juice bar so we all piled in the car together. It was a surreal experience looking in the back seat and seeing Joanna, Mikias, and his birthmother sitting side by side. At the café, there was a small playground that Mikias loved. We all played for a while, had some mango juice, and were able to have a few more small conversations. We dropped Mikias' birthmother off on our way back to Addis and part 1 of our day was complete. We are so thankful to have had this experience and consider ourselves very lucky to be able to share this with Mikias someday. This 1.5 hours this morning made it worth bringing Mikias all the way back to Ethiopia. We're so glad that all the details worked out.

After arriving back in Addis and decompressing a bit from the full morning, our group met at 2pm in front of the hotel to get our rides to the orphanage. It was obvious that everyone was a bit nervous and tense as we loaded into the cars. This was entirely different experience than before since there were seven other families with us and we weren't alone. It was actually very comforting (and exciting) to be able to share this experience with all of these other people. We arrived at Enat Alem orphanage and we were all waiting in the courtyard taking pictures and prepping ourselves. We were then told that we could come in to the room and get our children. So we all headed in scanning all the cribs looking for our children. I was worried we wouldn't be able to spot Sintayehu from the pictures we had seen, but when we found him sound asleep in the third crib we looked in, there was no doubt it was him. We hesitated a moment since he was sleeping, but after waiting about 5 seconds we scooped him up. What a cute little guy! It was so awesome because all around the room you could see other families finding their children and lifting them up. It was suddenly very noisy with all the talking and laughing and crying. Everyone was taking pictures of everyone else and we were all so happy for one another. Sintayehu didn't really fuss at all and we even got him to smile a few times within those first moments.

Afterwards we spent some time talking to the nurse and caretakers about Sintayehu's schedule. We then all gathered in the courtyard for a traditional coffee ceremony. Meanwhile, a lot of the other children in the orphanage came out and a lot of people in our group were playing with them. Sintayehu took this time to spit up on me a few times. It seemed like everytime I held him he spit up but Joanna always came away clean. Oh well, I certainly didn't mind. We also fed him his first bottle as we were waiting for the coffee to finish. The experience at the orphanage was simply amazing.

After a quick trip back to the hotel, we were reunited with Mikias and our parents on the front steps. The entire group waited for us so we could have our reunion with our family before they came in to the hotel. I can imagine that it was quite a sight with all of these families returning with new children at the same time. For the next few hours we all hung out in our room getting to know Sintayehu. Sintayehu kept surprising us. We had him on the floor playing and then he suddenly rolled over and stuck his head up and started grabbing for things. We really didn't know what to expect since we're not exactly sure what he can do yet…I'm sure we'll find out soon enough! Mikias has been pretty good around him so far. He hasn't gotten too close to him, but they've been playing near each other and I think that's a good thing. Joanna got Sintayehu to laugh out load and then stick out his tongue which we all thought was hilarious.

Tonight we had dinner with all of the other families here in the lodge. Sintayehu had a bottle while we were eating dinner and has now been sleeping for 4 hours. That's pretty good. I'm sure he'll wake up starving soon. We finalized the paperwork we need for Sintayehu's embassy appointment tomorrow afternoon. That should go pretty smoothly. Other than that, we're just basking in the excitement of the day. I don't think we'll ever have many days better than this.

Introducing Tayeh

2009-04-01T12:58:00.001-04:00

We wanted to post a quick picture for those back home. What an unbelievable day!! We'll post later and hope to include some more pics.

Trip North Day 3 and 4

2009-03-31T18:41:00.003-04:00

Yesterday morning, after breakfast, the group (including Mikias) left the lodge for an overnight trip to the North. Fortunately, Benjamin, Mikias and I were able to drive with Alemu in his car. This was much easier for us as the rest of the group were in mini-buses. There are no car seats, so Mikias just sat on the backseat of the car and relied on the outside "animals" to try and keep him in his seat. Although not always successful, the majority of this ride went smooth. The highlight of these drives were related to the various villages we would happen upon where again we could pay witness to the day to day lives of Ethiopians. Today was a major contrast than what goes on in the city. The agrarian lifestyle is prominent. The houses are traditional. We saw many people walking to get water, attending school, plowing their fields, sifting the teff (grain used for making injera) or simply just sitting around.

After traveling about 100 km to the north, we stopped at the hotel we would be staying at to eat lunch. The rooms were small, didn't have electricity until after 9pm and the meat had to be brought in from Addis, as a butcher was not available during the fasting portion of Lent. Nonetheless, it was place to stay and we are in Ethiopia! I thought it was pretty amazing this place existed after a few of the villages we drove through.

The beginning of outing began with a trip to a monastery. Now, we did this 2 years ago but we had a completely different experience this time. First of all, as we were pulling on to the dirt road that leads to our destination, we stopped to watch the baboons. Mikias found the "monkeys" entertaining. I found my Dad entertaining as he decided to follow them, with my Mom quickly calling "Tim!" The other reason for this stop, was a very scenic panoramic gorge. Our group tends to draw a pretty big crowd, as we are 21 deep with 17 of us being white. Beggars tend to gravitate towards us and this stop was no exception.

Anyhow, upon entering the monastery area, we learned that the road leading up to it was being worked on. Therefore we had to walk from that point on. This walk turned out to be a pivotal part of our day. First of all, the village leading up to this area is extremely poor and there are people everywhere. We certainly stood out. More than that, Benjamin and Mikias stood out the most. Mikias was strapped to Benjamin's back in a hiking pack. Now, I am not sure what the exact stares and laughs were about, but I am sure we will continue to think about this. Was it this crazy contraption on his back…whereas local women just use cloth? Was it the fact that a male was carrying a child? Or, was it because Mikias is Ethiopian? Nonetheless, it was pretty obvious that we attracted much attention.

Upon entering the monastery, the most beautiful thing happened. As our group was walking towards the entrance, the service was letting out and a sea of "white" exploded upon us. There had to be at least 100 people coming out, dressed in traditional garb. It painted quite a picture. I know many of the group was awestruck and felt very privileged to see something so powerful.

Anyhow, after the brief tour inside, one very interesting story to share at some point, the same walk back to our cars and then a quick drink inside a local house, we were back in our vehicles to stop for juice and back to the hotel for dinner. At this point, Mikias was very tired and we turned in early for a good night sleep. How do I know this? Well, the light when ON at 9pm and we were in bed.

Today began early with about another 100km drive to the Blue Nile Gorge. This was absolutely amazing and was the highlight of our day. Some of our group who had been to the Grand Canyon, said this was much bigger. It was pretty cool. We drove as far north as the Blue Nile Bridge, which had been completed recently. Then, we did a 180 and headed back the other direction for Addis Ababa. However, along the way we stopped to plow a field with cows (seriously, good story to insert here…), had a drink in a traditional farmer's house and stopped in an orphanage. Pretty full, yet another wonderful day.

However, I heard Benjamin ask Mikias if he knew what tomorrow was. Mikias answered "tumblebus"! While his answer is correct as the tumblebus does in fact come to daycare on Wednesdays, I don't think even the tumblebus in his world can compare to what our day will look like in our world tomorrow. Perhaps, this is why I am still awake typing this at close to 2 in the morning…

In the morning, we are going to Debre Zeit, to see Mikias' village and more importantly, visit with his birthmother. We met her 2 years ago and are very excited to see her again. We made a photo album for her of Mikias' 2 years with us. However, even greater than that, we were informed today that Mikias is able to travel with us and in fact will be able to see her. I am so excited for him, for her…for us. While we recognize that this will be difficult and emotional, we are so thankful and excited for what this will mean to him as he grows up.

AND….as if all this is not enough……the biggest excitement is at 2pm (that is 6am US time - and only 12 short hours away) tomorrow we meet Sintayehu! I can't believe that this day has finally arrived. Tonight is the last night for Mikias to be an only child and the last night that our new sweet son will be sleeping in an orphanage! We hope to be able to post some pictures tomorrow, so everyone can get a look at the newest McKinney! Isn't life great?

Cathedrals, Museum, Shopping and Dancing

2009-03-29T17:11:00.001-04:00

Our day started at 2:30am when all 3 of us were up and were apparently very hungry…so we had a family snack. :) As it turns out, many of the group was up at the same hour. Evidently, our internal clock is in process of being reset. We were able to go back to sleep until 8am, though.

We had a full day of bumming around the city. This morning Mom K, Dad K, Ben and I went with the group to visit 2 cathedrals and a museum. On our trip 2 years ago, we saw the museum, but this guide was really informative. So, most of today's activities were new for us as well. It was neat being with my parents as they were able to learn some history of Ethiopia. At one point, a deacon began to sing and move using this very large drum. It brought tears to my eyes as he spoke so passionately about his country and relayed heavily the message of "when we bring our children back to visit their home country, it is important to expose them to…" and he would cite a variety of things. It reinforced some deeply held beliefs that we already have about our sons and their country.

After, we went to lunch where I was able to eat my first authentic Ethiopian meal. The injera was delicious and it made me quite excited to recognize a number of dishes on the menu. Soon after lunch, we had a shift change in which Mom and Dad K went back to the Lodge so that Mom and Dad M could spend some time out in the city. Mikias had a full day of grandparents!

The afternoon's activities included some shopping. Caroline, you will be happy to know that your girls now have Ethiopian outfits as requested. It was quite fun seeing all the little African things to buy. We were able to purchase Sintayehu's baptism outfit and have started the collection of small 18 gifts for his first 18 years of Gotcha days. We are finding this a bit challenging as we are trying not to duplicate the things we bought for Mikias. Mom and Dad M. seemed to enjoy this time out and certainly liked the shopping as Scott noted, he hadn't taken very many pictures.

The fun part about being out and about is that you get to pay witness to the every day life of Ethiopians. Most people have a notion in their mind of what this may consist of. I find it very intriguing to scan the streets and note the different roles. The shoe shiners, market workers, little kids selling gum or tissue, beggars, women selling vegetables, businessmen, donkeys, stray dogs all seem to play a piece of the puzzle of this country. This is what is going on in their day to day as mine consists of going to work, feeling like I am contributing to something and being with my family. I would dare say we are doing the same things just in a different manner. (well, maybe not the donkeys!)

I have really enjoyed talking with my mom and dad since arriving. I know they have had some big moments of "wow", "oh my" and "holy crap". They are doing great for 2 people who have not been out of the country before. I am so proud of them. My mom has made a few comments that have given me chills.

Tonight, both sets of parents and Benjamin went to a traditional Ethiopian Dinner and Dancing. Benjamin said they had a great time eating, listening, watching and even Scott dancing. I am anxious to see the video. Mikias and I hung out tonight, watched a movie and laid in bed together. He is doing a great job so far even though he hasn't been able to be out in the city. (We will save that for another post…)

Tomorrow we are heading on an overnight visit to the North. I am very excited for this as Mikias is able to go and we are visiting the Blue Nile Gorge, which may parallel, in its own way, the Grand Canyon. Unfortunately, we will not be able to post, as we will likely be unable to have access to the Internet. We will be sure to post again as soon as we can. In the meantime, to our families…moms and dads are doing well and we are soaking up every minute!
And…in case you may have forgot we only have 3 days until we meet Sintayehu!!

Ethiopia!

2009-03-28T14:15:00.001-04:00

After a lo-o-o-ong flight sequence we finally landed in Addis Ababa this morning. Mikias was fantastic on the flights as we utilized several of the tricks up our sleeves. Papa McKinney and Gia Karwan being two of them. It was funny because at one point Mikias had decorated himself with sticky note tabs. Although challenging to travel with a toddler, we are so far still standing.

We also have had the chance to meet the other families who are here from our agency. Our common thread besides the obvious is that all of our children are in the same orphanage and we believe in the same room. This will make Wednesday very exciting for this crew.
Upon arrival, we played a huge game of find your suitcases! As previously mentioned, we brought loads of formula so we certainly looked quite the site as we tried to find and organize our baggage. Fortunately, after only 3-4 stops, we finally walked out the airport doors to a warm air that has not been felt since early fall. We loved the fact that we were in t-shirt weather. Mikias loved the fact that his t-shirt was speckled with lollipop pieces, as this is what occupied his time during the aforementioned chaos.

After Getachew, a driver, creatively stacked rows of suitcases 3 high on the top of a "trek type car", we caravaned to the Lodge for which we spent a large portion of the day. I did manage to sneak a peek of our parents eyes as we drove to the lodge all seated side by side (including Mikias). Ben and I did feel it was quite exciting to see the hustle and bustle of Addis Ababa with familiar eyes. It made me very happy to have Mikias right there. It is all so real now!

The rest of the day was spent feeling jet-lagged, as sleep did not happen for all very much on the plane. Ben and I were able to fight it all day and at the completion of this post, will be fast asleep. We hope Mikias follows suit. The adopting families did all go out to eat together, so this was a nice opportunity to feel connected to a group. Later, our parents and Mikias joined us for dinner where a plan was laid out for the week. Of all the exciting things to come and see….by far the topper is the excitement of meeting Sintayehu on Wednesday!

On Hold in the D

2009-03-27T05:56:00.001-04:00

We woke up at 3am, got ourselves to the airport, and checked in. We arrived at the gate about 45 minutes ago only to find out that our flight is delayed because of fog in DC and will (hopefully) now leave at 7:30. This will really make things tight in DC. We're praying that we're able to leave soon so we can catch our flight to Ethiopia. Things will really get messed up if we don't get on that flight.

The time has come

2009-03-26T21:30:00.001-04:00

Well, here we are at a hotel near the airport. We take a 6am flight to DC and then off to Ethiopia from there. We're actually getting very excited...now that all the packing and planning is done. The past few days have been very, very busy getting last minute stuff done and trying to maximize absolutely every last pound of packing space. We're happy to report that our group (us + our parents) will be delivering 6 very full suitcases of formula. Also, we sent an additional suitcase with another family...that's a total of 350 lbs of formula!!! Thank you to everyone. We'll also be able to send formula with other families in the future with all the donations and money we have left over.

We're a little anxious for tomorrow's flights, mainly because we hope Mikias is able to survive the long flight without too many meltdowns. That's what the granparents are for...keep that boy entertained!!

But, most of all, we're counting down the days (only 6!) until we meet our newest little boy. That will definitely make the insanity of the last few days well worth it.

The next time we're able to write will likely be from Addis. Signing off from USA, with anticipation of soon signing on in Ethiopia!

New pics!

2009-03-21T16:12:00.001-04:00

We received a few new pictures of Sintayehu a couple days ago from our adoption agency. These pictures make us even more anxious for our trip. What a cute little guy!

We're doing a pretty good job of prepping for the big trip. Of course, we still have a ton of things to do, but we're slowing crossing things off the list.

Happy 1/2 Birthday Little One

2009-03-17T20:12:00.003-04:00

Our youngest son turns 6-months old today. Happy 1/2 Birthday Sintayehu! Mommy and I can't wait to meet you two weeks from today.

Tubes, Suitcases and Chaos

2009-03-16T21:53:00.002-04:00

This morning Mikias had a successful surgery in which he had tubes put in his ears. He was a trooper and as it turned out the CRNA on duty was my former student's father. Even though I didn't know him well, there was some comfort with this. He commented something about the fact that we were able to effect each other's children. I am sure glad that his kids did well in my class :)

Anyhow, Mikias and I had a day together as a result. His medicinal routine is quite the sight right now as he is finishing up some antibiotics and eye drops from earlier last week coupled with new ear drops and a malaria script to fill. When it is "go time", he lays down on his bed with his lion (which he calls Bear - no idea why?) drinks his candy out of the dropper, lets us put eyes and ears drop in both his and Bear's eyes/ears and we are all good. Happy Monday! The highlight of his day was for sure yelling "Ice Cream Truck" as we were able to enjoy today's weather.

For those of you who know me well...I would like to think that I am natural, organic and green. However, this week I feel like we are a Rite-Aid pharmacy complete with Sponge Bob Square Pants processed nutrients. Ugh!

Anyhow, over the weekend, we had a meeting with our parents to discuss the upcoming trip. Benjamin had a fairly long "topics for discussion" list. Even though I had lost my voice by Friday night, I found myself getting very excited as we discussed the trip in greater detail. We also have moved further along on the gigantic list and was able to check off getting all the bottles ready, one suitcase loaded with exactly 48.5 lbs of formula and both the boys closets completely ready through summer. Small pause for a victory pat on the back and we are off to the races again...tomorrow.

Time keeps on ticking....

2009-03-10T20:36:00.003-04:00

It appears as if our lives have taken on a countdown approach until our travel. As soon as we cross something off our list, 4 more things replace those we just felt momentarily accomplished by. Hence, the perpetual list-making has become a catch-all for all the incidentals and semantics that fly out of our mind at any given moment.

Ironically, the cadence we are experiencing is simply the rhythm of our lives. We have somehow always had these pockets during our married life where we experience a lot of activity and then moments of calm. This morning Mikias woke up with his eyes crusted shut. (How does this sentence appear in this paragraph, you ask?) Well, these crusted eyes turned into a dr. appt where we found out that he has a double eye infection coupled with a double ear infection. You would never know he had these ailments as he runs and screams around our living room. Anyhow, where this discussion leads is the realization that we now have to schedule another "ear tubes surgery" before we leave. Mind you, as the ticker on the side of our blog keeps subtracting by one each dawn, we wonder how in the world are we going to fit this in?

Mikias had tubes put in early 2008. He had had multiple ear infections leading up to the original decision. We were so relieved once the surgery was over and had multiple months with no infections. Since his tubes have fallen out (recently), this is his second go around. Of course, with a long flight, the consideration of tubes is much more urgent. We spent a portion of the day going back and forth...should we not take him with us?...can we squeeze this in?...are we bordering on insane? Ultimately we have an appt scheduled for Thursday with the ENT and then only time will tell.

So, as much as we are anxious about meeting Sintayehu, I have to be honest and say I am just as anxious about the preparation leading up to departure. We have had some small moments of reprieve as we have AAI people in ET now with formula in hand. Mikias is now in his new room and Sintayehu's room is more than starting to take shape. We have a travel meeting with our parents lined up. Our accommodations are set for ET. However, do you think we have a gallon of milk in our fridge? That would take serious coordination.

In any event, time keeps on ticking... and we keep grabbing every minute we can. I can say with most certainty that I can't wait until we grab those first minutes with our next little man!

Plans are set

2009-03-02T12:39:00.003-05:00

Just a quick update on all the planning here. Last Thursday, we found out when our Embassy date with Sintayehu will be. It is set for April 2nd. As a result, we were able to (quickly) make our travel arrangements.

We did have some decisions to make about who exactly was traveling. We decided that we will be taking Mikias with us. Once we were able to talk to some people about the accommodations in Addis, we were much more comfortable with taking him. We didn't want him to go stir-crazy for the week we're there...hopefully that won't be the case. Of course, we do still have to survive a very long plane ride ride with Mikias. This is where the grandparents come in! We'll also be joined on our trip by both sets of our parents. We had the idea of them coming with us when we first started the 2nd adoption, so I'm glad that it is going to work out. We think it will be very important for our kids' grandparents to have seen and experienced their home country. This means that 7 of us will be traveling to Ethiopia...and 8 will be traveling back! How exciting!

So, our plans now have us leaving on March 27th and returning on April 4th. It's a little shorter than our trip to get Mikias, but I think it will work out nicely. We'll have 3-4 days in Ethiopia to sightsee, etc. before we get Sintayehu.

We can't begin to express how great it is to finally have a definite timeline laid out. Now we just have to get ready!

We passed court!

2009-02-25T20:18:00.004-05:00

Joanna and I received word this afternoon that Sintayehu's case passed court today! We are so excited! This now means that the adoption is final in Ethiopia and he is officially our son. It's hard to believe we're now the parents of two little boys.

Here's pictures of the new little man that we can now post.

Referral picture from Dec 08

Updated picture from Jan 09

Mikias sporting his "big brother" shirt tonight

It sounds like we'll be travelling in about 4 weeks...we still have to work out all those details. For now, we're extremely grateful that everything fell into place. Thanks to everyone who has been thinking of / praying for us.

The turnaround

2009-02-24T20:04:00.003-05:00

Well, just when we had already accepted the fact that court would be indefinitely delayed for us and all AAI families, it seems like some last minute happenings in Ethiopia will allow our case to go to court tomorrow!! We received an email today saying that the issue has been resolved and we will continue with our court date tomorrow as scheduled. Essentially there was a problem with our agency's license (this did affect a few agencies actually), but it's all good now. This problem had the potential of affecting a whole lot of families with court dates this week and in the near future and could have created a mess trying to reschedule everyone. We were thinking that we'd be delayed a couple months. We were actually told last week that it would take a miracle for us to keep our original court date.....I guess that's what we got!

Needless to say our heads are spinning a bit with all of these ups and downs. We're hoping tomorrow is another "up" and that court goes smoothly. If so, we'll officially be the parents of TWO!

A little guy and his friends

2009-02-23T21:27:00.005-05:00

This past Friday afternoon we were scheduled to have a "phone meeting" with our consultants about our upcoming court date for Sintayehu. While the intention of the scheduled meeting was to discuss travel arrangements, the tone quickly changed after we were informed that there have been complications that may delay our court date. Unfortunately, the reality is that "may" seems like a far reaching comment. We are not expecting anything on Wednesday. We are so disappointed. We are not sure, at this point, when those complications will be remedied.

However, deeper than that disappointment is fear. We also learned that the formula situation in Ethiopia is becoming "precarious". It appears that the orphanage that Sintayehu is in doesn't have a surplus of formula. While formula being sent over has certainly been attempted, the most full proof way of having the formula arrive is with people handing it off directly. The adoption boards have come alive with plans, for which we are grateful. We hope to connect with a family who is traveling mid-March to be able to hand off the stockpile in our basement. Ironic that there is formula right under me and a child 7337 miles away who needs it. Scratch that....children 7337 miles who need it now!

Our Saturday consisted of us searching the Ethiopian Airlines website looking for flights to have ready should we get the go ahead to hop on a flight with formula in tow. Does it seem irrational that a parent wants his/her child to have food? To say that this is frustrating and sad is an understatement. I hate feeling helpless while we go about our daily happenings. I hate the fact that when Mikias didn't finish something at dinner, I noticed it more. More than anything, I hate the fact that this is our son we are talking about.

Today we received word that a doctor had visited our son. On January 6th, Sintayehu was 5.8kg. Today he is 6.0kg. We are thankful that there are hands to examine him. We were also told that our contact feels as if they have enough resources until our next group arrives. These are all good things....at least enough to stall us from purchasing tickets, for now.

The hardest part of our surreal experience is that hunger is the reality for many people on a daily basis. We only feel deeper now because we are talking about our family member. I wish I knew how to bottle these feelings up so I can remember them when our life returns to "so called" normal. The clarity that is present right now is certainly powerful.

When you have a moment....please send some thoughts across the ocean to a little guy and his friends who could use a little love.

His court date is a comin'

2009-02-11T22:46:00.005-05:00

71 days ago we found out that we had a new family member on the way who was about 75 days old. 14 days from today we will have our first, and hopefully only, court date to find out if we are officially his parents. Afterwhich, we cross our fingers and let another 28-42 days pass until we tentatively arrive in Ethiopia, after 19 hours of flying, with 4 grandparents, 2 parents and 1 brother to Sintayehu. Then our new family of 4, will travel approximately 7337 miles from Addis Ababa, Ethiopia to our front door. I am so excited! This is, of course, if evertyhing goes as planned...but who's counting? :)

Overdue Pictures

2009-02-05T20:39:00.005-05:00

We've been meaning to post pictures of some of the happenings of the last month.

Up North over New Years

A typical 2-year old moment

Celebrating Ethiopian Christmas

Our budding musician

...warming up with the band

Hunger

2009-01-29T20:37:00.004-05:00

I had forgotten how much waiting is part of the adoption process. With Mikias, we were so anxious and felt like we were waiting "all the time". When he was finally home, you erase all those frustrating feelings from your memory and dive in to bonding, adjusting...parenting. With Sintayehu, the wait has been longer and harder. Coupled with the fact, that you learn new things which gives you one more thing to worry about.

Recently, we discovered that Ethiopia has a shortage of formula. Yes, you read that right. A shortage of formula. It is often hard for me to wrap my head around the ideals of hunger when everywhere I turn, food is around me. Most groceries stores have aisles of food and stacks of formula at that. So, how is it possible that there is a shortage of formula? And a shortage of formula in a country where my son is at! It makes me want to scream.

I often find myself in a struggle between the reality of how things are and the way things should be. I find myself angry at the thought that orphanages in Ethiopia probably don't rank high on a list of formula "getters". I struggle with my thoughts of how this is being remedied at the moment. My thoughts usually center on less feedings, watered down nourishment and then an overall feeling of dispair. Of course these are speculations and it gets tiring trying to dig around and find out what really is going on. Do I even want to know?

Benjamin and I are well aware that this is part of the choice we made in adopting from a country where resources aren't as plenty. It doesn't make it hurt any less. Although, in many ways, it has been a gift as the perspective gained is priceless.

When I fast forward to the day we will meet Sintayehu and leave the orphanage with him in our arms, I know we will feel relief. However, I anticipate the look back over our shoulders on our way out too. It is those kids that I can't get out of my mind most of all. It is the children who are there right now, who may or may not be HIV+, that might have a lesser chance for a different option. Whether Sintayehu knows it or not, he is already loved deeply. He will be nourished by much more than food. I just feel so much for children that remain who hunger for a family, hunger for love and now have to hunger for food.

As a mother, my daily prayer is that our son feels nourished by hope that we will be there soon...

What I told Mikias

2009-01-22T19:44:00.004-05:00

On Tuesday I went to pick up Mikias from daycare (my new routine since Joanna's new job). When we got back in the car NPR was replaying Obama's inaugural address. I really wanted to listen to it again so I told Mikias we were going to listen to this instead of music...he was ok with it.

Then I told Mikias that Obama was our new President. I told him how people all over the country were excited about the change it looks like this man will bring. I told him how Obama is going to try to be someone who first talks and listens to people instead of quickly starting wars. I told Mikias how Obama's election proved that people are considering the content of one's character rather than the color of one's skin. I told Mikias that President Obama's daddy was born in Africa, in the country right next to where Mikias was born...he thought that was pretty cool...I do too.

The past couple days I've picked up Mikias from daycare, loaded him into the car, and asked "Do you want to listen to music?". "No," Mikias says, "Obama!!".

Merry Ethiopian Christmas

2009-01-07T09:13:00.000-05:00

I've finally done something I've been meaning to do for a long time. For Christmas I bought Mikias and Sintayehu an Ethiopian flag. My plan is to bring out the flag and display it on all the major Ethiopian holidays. I thought this would be a really cool tradition for the boys. Luckily, we got to use the flag very soon...today! Today is Christmas (Genna) in Ethiopia. We plan on getting some Ethiopian food from a local restaurant and having our parents over for dinner. It should be fun.

Merry Christmas everyone!

Merry Christmas...Happy New Year...and we have a court date!

2009-01-04T19:50:00.003-05:00

The holiday season was so much fun this year with Mikias. He really enjoyed being around everyone, especially his cousins. He can't seem to get enough of them. He is old enough to want to be with them, but usually ends up being the third person in a string of three running around whichever house we are at.

For the most part, the break from work was good. We had such high expectations of getting a new room together, cleaning out some much needed files and well, you know, doing all the other things that should be done all along. As fate would have it, we spent a good portion of the break sick and none of the aforementioned happened. Such is life...Ben and I work really well with deadlines, so perhaps getting ready for Sintayehu's arrival will be another example of this.

Speaking of deadlines, we received word that Sintayehu's court date is February
25th! This is the day that all parties involved have to have all the proper paperwork to finalize the adoption. Court dates can go through on the first time, however there is no guarantee. We are cautiously optimistic that all will go as planned and will be able to start to make travel plans in conjunction with the embassy date. Typically, this would happen 4-6 weeks after a successful court date!

Honestly, Feb 25th seems like a long ways a way! Benjamin and I agree that this adoption has been a little harder as the time frame has been extended and as parents already, we have an acute awareness of what we are missing out on right now. Having said that, we do take some comfort in knowing that he is surrounded by his people and is soaking up what Ethiopia has to offer him right now. I know we both think continuously of our little guy and hope he is being loved by those geographically close, yet feels the many thoughts that go out to him from this side of the world too!

I have to admit, that sometimes when I am with Mikias, I think to myself... is it possible to love another child as much as I do him? But, when I stare repeatedly at Sintayehu's picture, I already know that answer.

Here are a few pictures of our holidays!

Hangin' with Santa

2008-12-17T22:25:00.004-05:00

Joanna and Mikias squeezed in a quick visit to Santa yesterday. Mikias thought the whole thing was pretty cool, but he got fairly stoic (see pictures below) when he actually went to meet Santa. It's hard to believe that these could be the first in a long line of pictures if we follow the Karwan tradition. Every year since they were born, Joanna and her siblings have their picture with Santa. The tradition has grown to include spouses and children now so we're all part of it.

Powerful

2008-12-09T22:19:00.003-05:00

Sinking in

2008-12-08T20:32:00.003-05:00

I'm sitting here listening to Mikias attempt to go to sleep on his first night without a pacifier. He's not "resting comfortably" to say the least. There are almost 20 seconds gaps without crying so we're getting there. We've got to break the habit sometime. There will be so many changes for Mikias in the coming months (new brother, new room, etc.) we though we'd start slow...turns out sleeping without a pacifier is not "starting slow" according to Mikias. We'll see how things go.

Anyway, I wanted to pass along some info about Sintayehu's name that my mom came across last week:

Sintayehu is a poetic name. The literal meaning is "how much have I seen"! It is a kind of expressive name that leaves new mothers wondering when they see their newborn baby. It is a very beautiful name.

It is pronounced Sin - TIE - u.

I actually confirmed the pronunciation when I spoke to the owner of Taste of Ethiopia as I was picking up dinner for us on Friday night. She said I had it right.

Needless to say, we are still super excited (of course) about our new boy. It was a bit of a whirlwind week last week and things are really starting to sink in. We're realizing that there is a ton of work to do get ready for the baby. Most importantly, we need to prepare Mikias' room so he can move and Sintayehu can get the crib. It feels like there is an endless list of things to accomplish before we even get to that...one day at a time. Also, we're trying to work out arrangements with Joanna's work schedule and my work schedule and how it is going to fit with travel and having two children. I think we've got a pretty good plan, it's just a matter of getting it work for us and our family.

As for the adoption process itself, we're now waiting to hear about a date for Sintayehu's court case in Ethiopia. This is the day when the adoption is actually final. I wouldn't anticipate this will happen until at least a month from now...could be longer of course. After that's all final we'll be able to make travel arrangements.

Finally, I want to mention what an awesome age Mikias is at right now. Of course I've thought this every step along the way! He's absorbing (and repeating) so much information. He's really into singing Happy Birthday probably because there are so many birthdays in our family in November & December. I think he assumes that when there are a bunch of people together now that it must be someone's birthday. He even gathers his toys together sometimes to do this...hilarious. But, the best thing by far is something he's only been doing for a few days now. He'll be playing and then totally unsolicited he'll come up to me, hug my leg, and say "I love you, daddy!". I say "I love you too, Mikias" and then he rushes back to playing. There's probably not a better feeling in the world.

Speaking of Mikias, he's finally asleep...and the house is quiet again.

Drumroll please........

2008-12-03T20:44:00.003-05:00

We have accepted the referral of a 2 month old baby boy named, Sintayehu. He is beautiful! We received the referral yesterday and have been staring at his pictures and thinking about him ever since.

We have been in this process for over a year and you never quite know what your reaction will be when the time comes. We knew this day would come, but it is still very overwhelming to look at every possible detail of your new child, yearn to touch him and then anticipate all that is to come.

We were so excited to bring Mikias upstairs to open the email with Sintayehu's picture and information. However, Mikias had other plans...the CD's really needed to be pulled off the shelf, the tin box which holds archaic maps surely needed reorganizing, and he would not have a chair on wheels stay in one place! As Benjamin and I read about and stared at our new son, I am pretty sure Mikias looked hilarious running around behind us knowing we weren't paying one lick of attention to him.

We did print off pictures and gave one to Mikias to hold. He said "Oh, Wow!" for one second and threw it back on the coffee table as if he was trying to appease us. We did keep repeating Sintayehu's name and he could only get out the last bit which amounted to "YEAH HOO!!!" So, loving your brother is a learned trait. We've got time for that...in fact, a life time!

We asked our parents to come over late last night for the news and pictures. We didn't tell them anything before they arrived. However, my Mom and Dad brought wine and Jill and Scott brought comfort food. Hmm...have we done this before?

And as if all of that isn't enough...our referral came on the same day as me accepting a new position as Curriculum Director of my school district. You know how you have one of those moments in your life where everything seemingly falls in to place...and then you wake up the next morning with fear in your eyes and an ache in your stomach. One day at a time....

Benjamin has this saying he has used with me repeatedly during the past couple of years..."Is it an Ortonville Day or Africa Day?" Ortonville is the "ville" I work in and when my response is Ortonville it usually means I have had some great moment with my students or feel challenged by my profession in a positive way. When my answer is Africa it usually means my mind was preoccupied with thoughts of a continent for which I feel called to and a country I feel deeply committed to in some strange way.

Yesterday was an "Africanville" day.... Who am I kidding...it was a "YEAH HOO" kind of day!

Two already

2008-12-01T22:34:00.004-05:00

It's hard for us to believe but Mikias' 2nd birthday was this past Saturday. He definitely seems like he's a little boy now instead of the baby we met in June '07. We had a birthday party for him. It was nice to celebrate with a few family and friends. Unlike last year, I think Mikias was aware it was his birthday. He even sang to himself (and has done so repeatedly since). A few pictures from the day:

Mikias playing w/ his new train

Enjoying some cake!

The animal pack

Summer and Fall of 2008

2008-10-28T22:17:00.002-04:00

I started a post sometime over labor day and here it is Halloween and I am finally getting back to it. Here goes....

The summer of 2008 came and went so fast that I hardly remember particular days. However, I sure do remember many moments. For the most part, the summer was great. I loved having day in and day out with Mikias. Each morning he would wake up saying "outside?" in this voice that made you think he had thought about it all night long. As we opened the blinds to reveal this mysterious place, his excitement grew as if he knew what waited would be the source of entertainment until naptime in which we began the aforementioned routine all over. "Outside" was clearly the winning word for him and would easily sum up his summer happenings.

Through my eyes, summer is where we had time. Time that is difficult to find now that the school year has started. We had time to visit with old friends and meet new friends. Time to be around family often, even sometimes unexpectedly. Time to run, walk, explore, go to the park and bike ride all in the same day. Now that school has started we have adjusted our routine to include work and jam packed fun weekends, all the while wondering when our new little one will enter our lives. More on that later....

In a photo glimpe, here is how our we spent our time.

Playing frisbee at his Gotcha Day Party!

Splashing at a spray park!

Watching a 4th of July parade in Harbor Springs.

Hanging out with his oldest pal, Seth!

Sitting in tractors with Daddy.

Waiting for Daddy to get home from work for more playtime!

Now that the school year has started, Mikias is enjoying his daycare day with all his new friends. Robin is awesome and has aided us tremendoulsy on this work/home/parent balance thing. We have been able to sneak in two fall weekends. The hayride where the familiy picture was taken was 2.5 weeks ago. The pumpkin shot was last weekend. Can you just feel the weather change?

Speaking of changes, you may have noticed a new look to our blog. Perhaps, this is a prelude to a new look our family will be having as soon as this second adoption is complete. After many months of what appeared as no movement or action, our agency has gained some momentum. For the most part, waiting hasn't been as hard because Mikias has filled our time so generoulsy. However, our 2nd adoption's timeline will soon pass our total timeline of our 1st. This is difficult to swallow, but as it did with Mikias, I am sure all of these feelings will erase as soon as we welcome our new little one.

As it stands, when asked, Mikias now responds to the question "do you want a brother or sister?" with "sister" or "do you want a sister or brother?" with "brother".

Either way, we are excited for what is to come...

Gotcha Day Video

2008-06-19T21:10:00.001-04:00

I just wanted to share a video I made for Mikias for his Gotcha Day. It highlights his first year with us.

Gotcha Day!

2008-06-09T21:51:00.009-04:00

Yesterday was Mikias' Gotcha Day...the day we met one year ago in Ethiopia. What a year it has been! We spent the sunny day together just the three of us.

Mikias was given his first hair cut. Or should I say, buzz? As you can see, the popsicle did not win him over. He did find it hilarious when he was staring at himself later in the mirror.

We also went to the beach where he enjoyed swimming, eating dirt and climbing on the playscape.

We ended the day by giving Mikias one of the 18 gifts we purchased for him while we were in Ethiopia. These animals have sat on his shelf, but he has never actually played with them before.

It was a pretty low key, yet fun, celebratory day. It is amazing to think one whole year has gone by since he joined our family. It's been said before, by others, but we have no idea what we did before we had him in our lives. (okay, maybe the house was cleaner)

That is a small price to pay for a large part of our hearts full.

May...came and went

2008-06-04T21:53:00.006-04:00

Well the countdown to summer has officially started. I only have 2 more exams to write, 180 more exams to grade and 7 more days to do it in! But, that's beside the point....as summer is soon to arrive!

This past May was extremely busy. It tends to be a busier time at school. I was coaching track. Benjamin was/is getting used to a new job, yet we somehow still found plenty of time to introduce Mikias to May in Michigan.

Here are a few of the highlights!

We visited the Detroit Zoo where Ben and Mikias spent some time exploring the polar bear exhibit.

We celebrated Mother's Day with the grandmothers.

We met up with Seth's family at the Lansing Zoo! I love the fact that these boys have seen so much of each other. It is so fun to watch them interact.

We also had a gathering at our house with families who have either completed or are in process of adopting through Ethiopia. All of these families live in the Detroit area. It has been exciting to have a group close to develop a connection with. (P.S. We still love the West Siders, but the convenience of closeness was nice.) I am looking forward to when both sides of the state can get together and continue to keep all of these kids connected .

There were 3 children from Ethiopia present: Zoe, Amilia and little man. Zoe and Mikias were in both orphanages together and are only 3 weeks apart in age.

The thing that has been creeping in my mind lately is how at this time last year we were running around like crazy in preparation to go and get Mikias. So as the countdown continues towards summer, it will begin with a celebration of Mikias' GOTCHA DAY!

Dossier Date 4.28.2008

2008-04-27T22:07:00.004-04:00

Our consultant, Chandra, contacted us on Friday to tell us that our dossier had safely made the trip from Detroit to DC, by way of the Ethiopian Embassy, back to GR and will be on its way to Addis on Monday! Thus, making our dossier date 4.28.2008. This date then marks the beginning of the next wait, which is a referral. We are last on the list....but at least we made it to the list!

In an ironic twist, we met Karen and Patrick soon after receiving our pictures of Mikias. They are in Ethiopia meeting their daughter right now....just as our packet arrives!

I have tried to talk with Mikias about bringing another child to the US from his home country. I explain that he will have a brother or a sister to play with. So far, his only response is "apple". (Sorry, Gwyneth, we will not be following your lead...)

Out of our hands

2008-04-19T21:01:00.006-04:00

Well, our dossier documents are now out of our hands and on their way to Washington DC for authentication at the US State Dept and Ethiopian Embassy. I mailed everything out this morning. It's a little nerve-wrecking putting all those documents in an envelope. I can't help thinking how much it would absolutely suck if they were lost in the mail. Of course there is some consolation knowing that we've done this once before and everything worked out just fine. Actually, I have to admit that it was pretty easy getting all this in order because we had done it before. In all, we had 21 documents that we collected, had notarized, and then had authenticated. Check out the picture...pretty impressive. I wish we would have taken a picture like this the first time around. This was my second chance so I couldn't pass it up.

Hopefully, at this time next week the completed dossier will be back in our agency's possession and will soon be off to Ethiopia! Then the wait begins. It's strange how it seems like everything is moving so fast this time around but in reality the process is slower. It must be because Mikias is distracting us from obsessing over this adoption.

This afternoon the three of us headed to the Earth Day Expo at Oakland University. It was pretty cool. Joanna and I have been there the past few years and really enjoy it. Mikias' favorite part was definitely the African dancers that performed. He was totally entranced for about 20 minutes.

Serious Motorboat

2008-04-17T19:52:00.008-04:00

A video from a couple weeks ago...I had to post it

In other news: Joanna and I are close to sending our completed dossier off to Washington DC. Tomorrow I'm going to the Office of the Great Seal (not to Lansing this time) to get all of our documents authenticated. Now they do document authentication at some Secretary of State offices and luckily there's one two miles from my work that offers the service. For Mikias' adoption I drove (twice) to Lansing to get this done. Anyway, if everything goes well our dossier will be in the mail on Saturday.

Other than that...just enjoying the nice warm weather and looking forward to the weekend.

Spring Break and The Golden Ticket

2008-04-11T23:32:00.003-04:00

This past week I did not have school as it was spring break. Of all the "spring breaks" I have had, this was one of the best. I had solid days just Mikias and I.
We took advantage of the great weather and I was reminded of how much Mikias loves the outdoors. Good times!

On Wednesday, we received our I-171H for the second adoption. This is known as the golden ticket in the adoption world. It does not get us a trip to a Chocolate Factory. In fact, it is a stamp of approval that says the US gov't feels we are able to "furnish proper care to an orphan as defined by section 101(b)(1)(F) of the immigration and nationality act". I feel so much better knowing that we have this declaration. We needed this same paper for Mikias...so I am guessing this time was just a double check. :)

What this does allow us to do is move forward with the second adoption. I am excited. We are taking the next couple of days to finalize our dossier and off it goes. At that point, our hands are off and we will be back to waiting for a referral. WOW!

Hard to believe it's been a year

2008-04-06T15:20:00.005-04:00

This past Friday was the one year anniversary of the day we opened our referral and saw the first pictures of our little boy. What a year it has been! It's amazing how much he's grown and it's hard to imagine what it was like before he was in our lives.

Frozen at One Year!

2008-03-03T21:36:00.004-05:00

So, apparently we have been on hiatus from the blog world! Can I blame it on the fact that I would love to freeze the age of Mikias on any given day? Oh, he is so much fun!

Aside form hibernating in this winter wonderland, things have been well. Christmas was wonderful. The highlight being my niece, who was 3.5 at the time, taking Mikias and introducing him to Santa as "her new baby cousin who came all the way from Africa!" This was a totally unprompted comment. So cute!

We have been enjoying winter. Mikias has gone snowshoeing, downhill sledding, on a toboggan ride on a frozen lake. We participated in a library program. He has visited Gigglebeans (a huge playroom for toddlers), been to Chicago (where he watched traffic for at least 20 minutes) and has seemed to enjoy his daycare. His latest tricks include repeating everything we say, sticking his hands in toilets, screaming at the top of his lungs while folding in half when he is doing something he is not supposed to be doing (aka...sticking his hands in the VCR door and getting stuck...often). Life is good.

We are STILL trying to balance the work, home, kid, life thing. Some days are good...some days...well you know. All in all, these months have been good.

Our adoption 2.0 (Thanks, Kubiks) has been moving along as well. We decided to adopt again through Ethiopia as we caught wind of some rule changes that might affect us. It is interesting how life takes you on a path in which you might not have "planned". It has been exciting to watch the developments in the Ethiopia program as many more families have brought their children home.

We are at the point where we are collecting our documents for the dossier and waiting for the golden ticket. The adoption world knows this as the I-171H!

Included are some snapshots of Mikias enjoying the last couple of months.

Happy 1st Birthday Mikias!

2007-11-29T20:49:00.000-05:00

I am so far behind with updating this blog with so many of the things we've had going on the last few weeks (meeting with the Norris', Thanksgiving, Mikias' birthday party, etc.), but I definitely wanted to make a point of wishing our little boy a Happy Birthday. It's so amazing to think that we posted a 1/2 Birthday message on here just six months ago...and we hadn't even met Mikias yet!! What an unbelievable 1st year this has been for Mikias. It's hard not to think of what he was doing and who he was with one year ago during the first hours of his life. We feel so blessed to now be his parents.

We celebrated a little bit tonight with Mikias...and as you can see from the videos and picture he celebrated a lot!

Happy Thanksgiving

2007-11-21T21:44:00.000-05:00

It isn't hard to figure out what we are most thankful for this year. Mikias has added so much to our lives that it is difficult to think about what we did before he was part of our family. For that, we are grateful.

Of course, I am also thankful for "our new normal". Recently, I returned back to work. Although it was extremely difficult to take Mikias to daycare for the first time, I have learned once again why I am working. It has been fun being back with my students in my classroom, despite the ridiculously difficult new Algebra curriculum that all of my 8th grade students are expected to take. Benjamin and I have worked out a decent daily schedule which still allows for plenty of Mikias time. It has still been a bit of a balancing act, but for the most part has seemed to fall into place.

One thing I would like to expand on was my experience with taking Mikias to daycare. Wow, I was not prepared for that one! We had been so focused on attaching to him that it didn't occur to me how difficult it would be to "let up and let go" a little. I do believe as I walked away the first day, I didn't even make it to the car without sobbing. My conversation on the phone with my sister went something like..."I dropped Mikias" (and I was trying to say at daycare, but was crying too hard). She responded "why are you calling me, call a doctor!". Of course, she soon found out I didn't physically drop Mikias but had taken him to daycare.

After some encouraging words and some better days at daycare, Mikias and I soon adapted to our new routine. Now, he enjoys going and I love peeking in on him right before I pick him up. It is in those moments before he sees me, where I am most proud of him and most grateful to his birth mother. First, because I am amazed by Mikias' resiliency. In his first year of life he has adapted so well to a variety of situations that I know there is nothing in his lifetime he won't be able to face. Second, I am so thankful for the opportunity to be part of his life. I have never felt love so deeply before which again makes the argument that "blood' has very little to do with family. Finally, I am so appreciative towards his birth mother who has so selflessly and even more difficultly "let up and let go" so that our son has a chance for a good life and we have been given the opportunity to peek in on him as he goes about his daily happenings.

For these reasons and many more it is indeed a happy thanksgiving!

Walking man

2007-11-06T22:37:00.000-05:00

Our boy is definitely on the move now. It was kind of odd to see him waddle in to the kitchen tonight when we were making dinner. He's still a bit unsteady, but I'm guessing he'll be an expert in no time.

Halloween and the turtle

2007-11-02T21:51:00.000-04:00

I just had to post a couple pictures of Mikias dressed as a turtle for Halloween. We took him to a few neighbors' houses, but mostly just to show him off. He was definitely more interested in watching all the other kids in the neighborhood in their costumes. Joanna's parents and Rick & Caroline came over so Elizabeth and Sarah did a little trick-or-treating...plus Mikias was able to play with his cousins all night.

It was an up and down week for day care. We took Mikias 4 days this week and things improved every day. Actually, today he was there for the entire day and did very well...he even took a nap!! This is a big deal because the caregivers couldn't get him to take a nap there all week until today. He has been fine all week when I drop him off but it seems like he's just so used to having someone give him 100% attention all day (either from Joanna or me), that it was a little hard to adjust at first. Joanna is back to work on Monday so hopefully things continue to improve.

In the last couple days, Mikias has been taking a few small steps on his own. His record is 7 so far, but I'm sure he'll be running all over the house in no time!

Autumn Happenings

2007-10-26T22:55:00.000-04:00

I am lagging way behind in providing updates on here. It seems that we've been very busy lately. The last few weekends have been pretty booked up for us. A couple weeks ago, the three of us went up to my grandparents' house (they no longer live there) in Gaylord. It was a very relaxing weekend. It was nice to get away from home for a few days. Basically, we just hung out, played, watched movies, and did some hiking. Every time we go up there I wonder why we don't take the trip more often. There will probably be snow on the ground next time we are there, but I'm happy we were able to enjoy some fall weather too.

Last Saturday, we got together with some of my friends (and their children) and went to a Harvest Festival at a local farm. Although we arrived a little late in the day, we were still able to jump on a hayride and see a lot of the farm animals. I think next year we'll definitely go a lot earlier in the day so we can take advantage of all the activities. It would be cool if we could make this a yearly tradition because it really was a lot of fun.

And then on Sunday we went with Caroline, Rick, their two girls, and the Karwan parents out to a cider mill/apple orchard in Armada that had a lot of activities for kids. Mikias definitely liked hanging out with his cousins. It was amazing how warm of a day it was considering it was mid-October. Overall, this was a very fun (and very long) day.

Needless to say, I think we've fully exposed Mikias to a complete "autumn experience".

In other news, Joanna is about one week away from returning to work. She took Mikias into his daycare on Thursday to try it out while she went to a few meetings at school. Unfortunately, Mikias did not have a very good day. He was fussy the entire time Joanna was gone and the caregivers had a hard time getting him to eat. I'm sure this is just because this is an unfamiliar environment, so hopefully things get better. We plan on taking him a few more times next week for a shorter amount of time to get him more comfortable.

Check out my new top teeth

2007-10-14T16:10:00.000-04:00

Reunited

2007-10-08T15:04:00.000-04:00

Last week, Thursday, Mikias and I drove across the state to Battle Creek. We met up with other AAI families who are adopting, or have adopted, from Ethiopia. Many of the faces were familiar as we had met some earlier in the year. However, these faces were also all a glow as many of them are now waiting on court dates and the go ahead to bring their children home.

One face in particular was very exciting to see. Seth Kidus, Deanna and James' son, was part of the crowd. It was very fun to watch Mikias and Seth play next to each other. Although they did not run into each other's arms, it was still exciting to know that the two of them have a connection longer than either of our families do with our son. Seth is only 3 weeks older than Mikias and we are hoping that this past meeting is only the beginning of a continuation of a relationship that started many months and miles ago.

In other news, this past weekend, we went down to Fort Wayne to visit Alison and Tom. It was fun watching Mikias interact with their dog, Motts. It was also very funny how the words used to communicate with a dog and a crawling infant can overlap. There were many times where the two of them were crawling around or chasing each other. Good times had by all!

Baptism Day

2007-10-03T21:24:00.000-04:00

Mikias was baptized on Sunday. What a great day it was. Everything worked out so wonderfully...from the church service to the family party. It just seemed like everything fell into place perfectly. Most of our family and friends were able to come to the church service. It was very cool to have everyone in church with us. Actually, I think half of the congregation at that service on Sunday morning were there for Mikias. Our friends Heather and Jerome are Mikias' godparents. Both Joanna and I wore the traditional Ethiopian clothing that we purchased in Addis Ababa in June. Mikias also wore a traditional outfit. It was important to us to incorporate the Ethiopian culture in the day's celebration.

Afterwards, we had everyone back to our house for lunch. Luckily, we had very good weather on Sunday so everyone was able to hang out in the backyard and enjoy the afternoon. We were able to have Ethiopian food (injera, etc.) for lunch thanks to the Blue Nile in Ferndale. Joanna talked to the cook there and, even though they don't typically do catering or carry-out, the cook went out of his way to make a bunch of food for us. It was awesome. When we went to pick up the food on Saturday I thought that there was no way we'd be able to eat all the injera (there was a huge pile of it). But, all of our family and friends really seemed to enjoy the food because we didn't have much left at the end of the day. Of course there were a few leftovers but Joanna and I have already finished that off. We also had special cupcakes made for the occasion with the Ethiopian flag colors.

For most of the day we just hung out with everyone and watched all the kids play in our backyard. Overall, we were so happy with how everything went.

2007-09-28T22:07:00.001-04:00

Not too much new in our world. Mikias is still crawling all over the place and occasionally takes a stroll using his "walker". I've been negligent in getting gates put up, so he is really requiring a lot of attention when he explores things on his own. He's had a runny nose all week. We thought it was because he was teething, but then I got a runny nose too...and I'm pretty sure I'm not teething. So, we've both got mild colds. Joanna has been able to avoid it so far.

Other than that, we're doing some prepping for Mikias' baptism on Sunday. We're planning on having all of our family for lunch after church. Luckily, it's going to be a nice day. We don't have a good cold-weather party house. Not enough room inside. One of these days I'll get to finishing the basement and the problem will be solved.

A few weeks ago, a reporter from our local paper came out to interview us about the adoption process. Our adoption agency was in touch with them. With November being National Adoption Month, the agency wanted to see if the paper would be interested in doing a story on us. The article was just published last week. It's ok...although I'm not thrilled about being quoted in reference to Angelina Jolie and Madonna. Of all the things they asked about, they choose to put this in the story! Oh well...here's the article.

Parents Choose Adoption Option - Oxford Leader

On the move in a whole new way

2007-09-20T20:49:00.000-04:00

Just wanted to share a quick video of Mikias from today. He's really progressing fast! He just crawled for the first time a few weeks ago. He went back and forth across the room like this quite a few times.

Mikias' teeth have really been bothering him for the past week too. He's getting close to breaking through a few more. He has been waking up a lot in the middle of the night so I think he's in a bit of pain...nothing some Tylenol can't help. Hopefully, that will be over in a few days.

A Night Out

2007-09-16T14:29:00.000-04:00

This past weekend we finally took our parents to The Blue Nile, an Ethiopian restaurant in Ferndale, to thank them for all of their help since we've been home from Ethiopia. Actually, our intention was to do this before we traveled in June, but things got too crazy and we never made it. On Saturday we went and everyone really enjoyed the food and atmosphere. Joanna and I had gone to this same place on New Years Eve this past year, but this time we noticed so many little things around the restaurant that reminded us of our trip. Unfortunately, the owners were in Ethiopia for the millennium celebration so we weren't able to talk to them. My aunt and uncle babysat Mikias so it was good to have an adult outing. Overall, it was a very fun time.

Here is Mikias' latest trick. He's certainly keeping us busy now!

Happy New Year - Y2K all over again

2007-09-11T20:22:00.000-04:00

Today the McKinney Family welcomed Ethiopia to the year 2000! Who knew we would celebrate the millennium with our son.

Yahoo.com Story

Wikipedia - Ethiopian New Year

On the move

2007-09-04T22:27:00.000-04:00

This past weekend we took the long trip down to West Virginia to see my grandma and introduce her to Mikias. Actually, we were long overdue for a visit down there anyways and luckily we didn't have any plans for the weekend. I don't think I've ever seen my grandma so excited about something before. I think she was anticipating our arrival all last week and went out of her way to make sure we had everything for Mikias once we arrived. Joanna and I were a bit concerned about the long drive (6 hours), but we tried to time our drives with Mikias' naps and that seemed to work well. Joanna did spend some time in the back seat entertaining him for a while.

It was a very relaxing weekend. We took a few walks and did a bit of swimming (especially Mikias!). Other than that, we just hung out, played, and napped all day long. It was kind of nice not having all the "responsibilities" of home hanging over our heads.

While we were there, Mikias decided he would crawl for the first time! He has been on the verge of crawling for about a week now, but he finally figure everything out and crawled across my grandma's kitchen. Needless to say, we really need to a little baby-proofing around our house now that he is out exploring everything.

These kids go way back

2007-08-29T21:15:00.000-04:00

Tomorrow is travel day to Ethiopia! Not for us of course...but for the Norris family. We met Deanna and James back in May at a dinner for families adopting from Ethiopia. At the time we had both just recently received our referrals. So, now, after a long summer of waiting, Deanna , James, and their daughter Taylor are leaving tomorrow to pick up Kidus.

Kidus and Mikias go way back. From what we understand, they both started out at the Adera Orphanage in Debre Zeit and then were brought at the same time to the Adera Orphanage in Addis Ababa. We actually had the pleasure of meeting Kidus when we picked up Mikias in June. The picture below is of Mikias and Kidus hanging out in Addis.

We actually were able to get together with the Norris family this past weekend. I hope we were helpful in answering some questions they had about travel. It's so exciting that the next time we see them we'll be able to reunite the two boys. We wish them the safest of travels and hope that they enjoy the experience of Ethiopia.

We know that so many people enjoyed reading this blog while we were in Ethiopia. Here's a link to the Norris' blog. Hopefully, they'll also be updating this during their trip.

http://deanna-norris.blogspot.com/

How did August 10th become August 20th?

2007-08-20T22:05:00.000-04:00

WOW! The days are moving along! It is hard to believe that the summer of 07 is almost over. Sigh!

The McKinney family is moving along just as quick as the summer. We have been enjoying our days together and most recently had a "welcome shower" for Mikias. Yes, the celebration continues. Benjamin's parents and Aunt put together a nice gathering in honor of Mikias' arrival. It was fun to have Mikias at a baby shower for him. He was passed around, hugged, kissed and loved the whole time. He received many nice gifts which included his entire winter wardrobe. Did I say how cute these little boys clothes are? We really appreciated the effort put in by Benjamin's family for this day. It was, yet again, another day to remember.

This past weekend we took a short, but much needed, family vacation. Being that our first trip of the summer involved getting our family, this one was much more relaxing. We spent the weekend Up North at Benjamin's grandparents house on Heart Lake in Waters. We hung out around the house, took a family nap, read, played basketball, went to the park and Ben & Mikias took a dip in the lake. Mikias loved the water. He laughed and splashed the whole time. It was so much fun!

2007-08-10T20:30:00.000-04:00

For the past 11 days Benjamin was on a road trip for work. During this time Mikias and I packed our days. This was my strategy for "dealing with" the absence of Benjamin. We visited cousins Elizabeth & Sarah, played with friends Ethan and Caleb and had a slumber party with pals Collin and Rylie. We had frequent visits with both Grandmas and Grandpas. We saw great-grandparents. We hung out with my friends. We went to church just the two of us. We went out to lunch. We shopped at Target (more than once). Today we went to a park where approximately 50 parents and students met Mikias. So, although it was difficult not having Benjamin here, we did well and I gained some valuable confidence along the way. Attached are some snapshots that capture the week.

In other Mikias news, Benjamin and I are just amazed how far Mikias has come since bringing him home almost 2 months ago. When he first came home we weren't even able to put him down by himself and now he is at the point of almost crawling. He is just working on getting that last leg out from underneath him. The newness hasn't worn off one bit. We still find ourselves saying "he is so damn cute". At the same time we are eager for the nights in which he makes it all the way through asleep. In the meantime, we just enjoy!

The following are links to a few stories that our adoption agency covered on our experience should you be interested. The Ethiopia program has gained substantial interest and we are fortunate to be able to help others as they begin their process. We are scheduled to speak at an informational meeting at the end of August. It is amazing what doors open when you open your life.

http://www.adoptionassociates.net/international/ethiopia/ethiopia_stories/benjamin_and_joanna/

http://www.adoptionassociates.net/newsletters/2007/08/international_adoption/

Away from home...and missing it

2007-07-31T22:31:00.000-04:00

First of all, our short camping trip over the weekend went very well. It's amazing how well Mikias takes to the outdoors. Once we got him to sleep, we simply put him in his stroller and he slept the entire time we were sitting around the campfire. He even did a great job sleeping in the pack-and-play in the tent too. Of course he did wake up a few times during the night but that has become normal for us. One thing I do know is that we need a little bit larger tent...there wasn't a lot of room to spare. We went camping with some of my friends from high school in honor of Rich's 30th birthday (sorry that I had to mention that, Rich). They all have kids now too and it was cool to see them all interact with each other. We actually got a really good picture of the kids that I'll have to post later on. The reason I can't do it now is....

I'm on a trip for work right now and not at home with my family. I'm in Phoenix and will be driving around the Southwest US for the next 1-1/2 weeks testing vehicles in hot weather...yipee. This really kind of stinks. Actually, the work is very interesting and I do enjoy it, but right now I'd much rather be home. It was crazy how much harder it was for me to leave for the airport Monday morning when I knew that I was leaving Mikias. In the back of my mind I'm thinking that maybe he won't recognize me when I return or that I'll miss some real big milestone while I'm gone. I already know he'll have more teeth when I get back. I also feel bad about having Joanna completely take on Mikias 24/7. It definitely makes it a little easier when there are two of us around. I guess the good thing is that this is the only work trip I'll likely have this year. I had four trips last year.

On track

2007-07-22T20:40:00.000-04:00

The last few days we've been able to turn the corner (hopefully) with Mikais' sleeping schedule. The past three nights he's been able to go through the night without us having to feed him. This is definitely some good progress. Of course, we're still getting up to sooth him a few times a night but it hasn't been too bad.

On Saturday we took Mikias to get blood drawn for some tests that were recommended by our pediatrician and the adoption agency. We thought we'd be in and out pretty quickly but it turned out to be a bit more of an ordeal than we were expecting. The nurse that was drawing his blood had a difficult time locating a good vein to use. She tried digging at his left arm with the needle for a couple minutes before giving up and moving on to the other arm. This was very hard to watch since Mikias was screaming at the top of his lungs the entire time. Luckily there was a bit more sucess with the other arm. Hopefully we won't have to do that again any time soon. It was 10 times worse than watching him get his shots.

We also had a lot of Joanna's family over on Saturday to celebrate her mom's birthday. It was fun having everyone over. We're still in the honeymoon phase where people don't mind driving all the way out to our house to see us. This will probably wear out fairly soon and we'll have to take the Mikias show on the road.

Today we set up our tent in the backyard in preparation for next weekend's camping trip. We wanted to see if we could fit the pack-and-play and our sleeping bags. It looks like it will work! I can't wait to see how the boy likes camping.

A lot of firsts

2007-07-15T22:02:00.001-04:00

I realize that it has been way too long since Joanna and I have posted anything on here. I often look at all of our postings from a month ago and think that there is no way that any given day now will ever compare to all of our experiences in Ethiopia. I guess maybe that's why I've been absent from this blog for a few weeks. But, the reality is that our life has definitely been interesting lately. There are so many new things that have become part of our everyday lives. Late-night feedings, changing diapers, play time, naps, and walks around the neighborhood are the norm now. I guess that means we're parents!
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It has been so great introducing Mikias to so many of our family members and friends. We've had a lot of visitors in the past few weeks and Mikias is really great with handling all these new faces. It's been especially neat to see other children interact with him. We are so grateful for all the people that have stopped by our house or called to check up on us. Actually, during the first couple weeks we were home these little visits or conversations were the best. They gave Joanna and I a little bit of time to chat with people and discuss our trip...and (to be honest) gave us a chance to take a breath while someone else held Mikias for a few minutes.

It's funny how even the most mundane everyday tasks seemed to have a little more excitement to them. For instance the "first time we took Mikias to church" or "the first time we took Mikias grocery shopping" or "the first time we took Mikias through the car wash". Also, we've taken him to a wedding and we've got our first camping trip planned in a couple weeks. It's kind of like we're introducing Mikias to our lives. He's always so good and takes all the new experiences in stride.

Overall, everything is going great. Our routine is much more manageable. We're getting slightly more sleep. Mikias is healthy and happy...and growing quickly. We're all having a lot of fun.

Home By 7 Months

2007-06-29T12:52:00.000-04:00

I remember before we received the court date, Benjamin and I were hoping that we would have have him home by his 7 month. We do! It is today!

The last couple of weeks have been a bit of a blur. We still have many moments where we look at Mikias and then at each other and can't believe he is really here. When you have an idea in your mind for so long, it is hard to change that idea into a living being. Well, until he cries.

He is gradually getting adjusted. We have been able to get him off his every 2 hour feeding from the orphanage to a more normal (for us) every 4 hour suck-a-thon. We think his ear infection is gone. His snots definitely are. He is not going to bed at 2 in the afternoon anymore. While all of these are good things, it is also weird to know that some of his characteristics of Africa are leaving. It is comforting to know he is more on our schedule but at the same time sad knowing that his "Africa time schedule" is gone. He no longer regularly sees people whose skin matches his. I no longer smell Africa on him. Instead, we are beginning to define a new normal for him and us which includes still trying to figure most everything out.

I am enjoying this time of transition but am saddened by already forgetting things of Ethiopia. Our pictures show some things, but can't replace vivid images. Our clothes have long been washed (yet, not put away) erasing the smell. However, I still can't bring myself to wash his socks from the orphanage. Every once in awhile I still open the plastic bag and smell a pretty distinct scent. We still have a chair of "stuff" we brought back and can't find the time to put somewhere. Yet, this is also comforting to have so I can pick things up and imagine where we were at when we purchased it.

I hope we raise him well. I hope we can replay enough of Ethiopia into our lives that he feels connected to his birth country. And although I know he will soon be a typical American toddler, I hope we can instill enough into our lifestyle for him to be defined as an Ethiopian American toddler.

Settling in

2007-06-20T22:03:00.000-04:00

The last couple days have mostly involved Joanna and I trying to get Mikias into some sort of schedule. We're still trying to adjust his eating and sleeping to something a little more manageable. We think he's still adjusting to the time change a bit too. Today we think we were pretty successful in spreading out his feedings and minimizing his lengthy naps. We'll see if everything works out tonight and he sleeps a little more consistently.

Yesterday Mikias had his appointment with the pediatrician. Being first time parents, this appointment was extremely helpful to us. Overall, Mikias is in very good health and is progressing developmentally quite well. Unfortunately, because of his ongoing cold, he now has an ear infection. This is the likely cause of some of his fussiness. Some antibiotics should take care of this.

Since his arrival in the US on Saturday, Mikias has been gradually meeting some of our friends and family and getting to know them a little better. It has also been great touching base with some people to begin telling our stories and sharing some of our pictures and video. We hope to continue to do this in the coming days and weeks.

It's felt a little strange to us pushing a stroller around the neighborhood or having a car seat in our vehicle. The feeling is a bit surreal. This whole experience has been almost like a dream. What an adventure it has been...but this is only the beginning!

We're back

2007-06-18T15:24:00.000-04:00

Everything on the trip back from Ethiopia went relatively well. Of course we were packing our stuff at the guesthouse up until the last possible minute, but we got to the airport with plenty of time to spare. While we were checking in for the flight we noticed a lot of other Americans that had Ethiopian children with them. It turns out that there were five other couples who were traveling together to pick up their adopted children. They were all working with an adoption agency in Minnesota. That made us feel a little more at ease that we would be enduring this marathon flight with other people in the same situation.
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In a nutshell, Mikias was awesome on the 17 hour flight from Addis to Washington DC. We were so lucky that we had a bulkhead seat with a bassinet. He slept a lot and when he was awake he was very content and playful. We made sure he was feeding on the ascents and descents and it worked like a charm. He was fussy a few times, but it was nothing that a couple laps around the plane didn't take care of. He got the attention of a lot of the passengers...probably because he is so darn cute. When we arrived in DC we thought that a 4-hour layover meant we'd have plenty of time to walk around and grab some lunch. We were definitely wrong. We had to go through customs, collect our luggage, go through immigration, recheck our luggage, check in for our next flight, go back through security, and find the gate. This left Joanna and I with about 5 minutes to eat a quick snack and left Mikias a little overwhelmed. When we got on the plane bound for Detroit he let loose. The a/c wasn't working on the plane and it was like an oven. He was drenched with sweat and I was soaked too. He screamed at the top of his lungs for the first 30 minutes of the flight. The a/c started working again and he finally fell asleep...whew.

Seeing all of our family and friends at the airport on Saturday afternoon was unbelievable. They all had signs and flags. It was very emotional. We dressed Mikias in a traditional Ethiopian outfit to meet everyone. It was great that so many people took the time to drive all the way to the airport to see us for only 30 minutes or so. It was cool because there were so many children there...nieces and nephews and family friends. All the kids were so excited to see Mikias and welcome him to his new home. One of my good friends took video of the whole thing so I'm anxious to relive it through that. After collecting our luggage (except one piece that I still haven't received yet), our parents drove us back home.

Once we arrived home we discovered that our family had signs waiting for us there too complete with a "Finish Line" on our driveway. More importantly, they had cleaned our entire house and prepared several meals for us. This has helped a ton. Mikias seemed to be really overwhelmed by everything and we had a hard time settling him down once we got home. Joanna and I were really sad about this because we realize how unfamiliar everything is to him...the people, the surroundings, the language, the smells. We were going through our suitcases trying to find anything (a toy he had played with in Ethiopia or clothes he had worn) that would help him feel a little more secure. Joanna finally walked around outside with him for a while and that seemed to help. Of course the 7-hour time difference was probably having its affect on him too.

Since we've been home our moms have helped out by staying the night and allowing Joanna and I to get some much needed sleep. It will still probably take a few days to get our bodies back on schedule, but we feel a lot better. We're still trying to get Mikias on schedule too, but that has been a bit more difficult. We have an appointment with the pediatrician tomorrow so hopefully they can help us figure out formula and feeding and all that stuff. We're still using formula we purchased in Ethiopia but that is quickly running out. His sleep schedule is also a bit messed up but I'm sure that will straighten itself out in the coming weeks.

For now we're still trying to unpack and settle in to our new family life. It is for sure much easier to do all this here than it was in Ethiopia.

Goodbye Ethiopia, Hello USA!

2007-06-15T08:20:00.000-04:00

Today starts our long trip back to the States. We are very excited to be heading home. Of course we’re a little anxious about the plane ride, but we’ll probably be just fine.

This morning we finally met Kurt, our adoption consultant, who arrived at the guesthouse late last night. It was kind of a strange feeling telling him about our stay in Ehtiopia and giving him some tips since he was the one we’ve turned to for answers during this whole process. This is his first time in Ethiopia and his first time meeting Alemu. He is here to visit new and existing AAI-affiliated orphanages and he will also be escorting a child back to the US next week.

After a lengthy conversation with Kurt this morning, Alemu took us to the US Embassy to pick up Mikias’ passport. That was a very quick visit. We were also given a sealed envelope that can only be opened by US Customs in DC when we arrive. This contains copies of all the final adoption decrees and other “official” papers. We sure hope all the correct documents are inside! Following the Embassy, we did some last minute shopping for gifts. Our intention was to get 18 gifts for Mikias’ first 18 birthdays. We did pretty well although Alemu could not assist with the negotiations so we’re not sure we got the absolute best deal.

We will now spend the afternoon packing and getting our things in order for our departure tonight. We need to be at the airport at 7pm to check in for our 10pm flight. We’re not really excited that we have to be there so early, but it is a small price to pay for starting our trip home.

Thank you everyone who left words of encouragement in comments and emails to us. They have definitely helped us during this trying but rewarding week. We look so forward to sharing all of our stories and experiences with you. Our next post on here will likely be from home!

Success at the Embassy

2007-06-14T13:38:00.000-04:00

Last night was better than the night before. Mikias slept well except for a 2-hour span from 2am – 4am when he was wide awake and crying. It seems like his nasal congestion is really giving him problems. Ben ended up holding him upright for an hour, so he could get some sleep. Hopefully, we can get this cleared up before tomorrow night’s flight. We’re very anxious about that flight. We just hope he doesn’t end up screaming for 17 hours all the way back to the U.S.

This morning we were able to talk to both of our parents on the phone. Alemu had given us a cell phone that we purchased some prepaid minutes for. So, the grandparents were able to hear Mikias for the first time. It was mostly crying for Joanna’s parents, but Ben’s parents got to hear some laughing and squealing. For us it was great to hear some familiar voices, if only for a few minutes.

Our only event for today was to attend our Embassy appointment at 1pm. Getachew (our power of attorney here in Ethiopia) took us for our appointment and we were a little late getting there because of some traffic. We were required to bring Mikias along too. This was the first time he has left the guest house compound since we brought him here from the orphanage on Friday. The whole process was pretty easy actually. We had to present some of the documents that we had filled out. Some immigration forms and U.S. tax returns were also required. After this we paid the visa fee and then had a short interview. Really the interview was only a few basic questions and took just a couple minutes. Success!! We were very excited that this went so smoothly. We just have to return to the Embassy in the morning to pick up Mikias’ passport and we should be good to go. Alemu told us later that he was a bit concerned about our appointment today because this is the first adoption AAI had done where the birthmother was known. He wasn’t sure if this would cause any issues. I’m glad he kept his concerns to himself and that everything turned out well.

This afternoon has been uneventful as we’ve spent the entire time around the guesthouse. We are beginning to pack our things up a bit. We also had the opportunity to present gifts to Getachew, Gizesh, and Hiwot for the help they have given us for the past week. Tonight Alemu is picking Kurt up from the airport so we expect to finally meet our adoption consultant this evening. It’s funny that we have to fly halfway around the world to meet him.

Tomorrow we’re hoping to also do some last minute shopping, but we’ll probably spend most of the day “prepping” ourselves and Mikias for the plane trip back home.

Not a normal day at all

2007-06-13T16:44:00.000-04:00

After we posted last night, we thought we had had a very nice and balanced day. That changed. Last night Mikias woke up at about 2am and we could not get him to stop crying. He would not take his bottle. He doesn’t know how to use a pacifier. (We have been able to get him to suck on an empty bottle nipple a few times.) It was awful and all we wanted to do was call someone (home) to find out what to do. Eventually, it got pretty bad and so Alemu suggested that we take him to the clinic.

Earlier in the week, when we picked Mikias up from the orphanage he did have a runny nose. So, all along we have suspected that some of his colic behavior was related to this. We noticed last night he couldn’t take the bottle because he couldn’t breathe. On top of that he was dead tired and really hungry. This is the point where we weren’t having fun anymore. It was difficult.

So, last night at 4am Alemu drove all of us to the local clinic. Our conversation prior to leaving went something like this “Bring all of our Ethiopian and US dollars, we are going to a developing country’s clinic.” It was not a good feeling. We were able to see the doctor pretty soon after we arrived, and he basically told us that Mikias was really congested. Luckily, his congestion is mostly in his sinuses and not his chest. We talked to the doctor about our concern about the flight home. In Ethiopia they do not give decongestants to children under one. The best he could tell us to do was to mix salt and water and place the drops into Mikias’ nose to help break up the congestion and then use the aspirator to clean it out. (We like this alternative better than the house maid who sucked out Mikias’ nose and spit it out - no, seriously)

After all was said and done, we were finally able to get him to breathe easier. We fed him a bottle and he fell asleep. This was somewhere around 6am. We were so exhausted mentally and physically at this point. We commented about how if we were at home we could just call our moms. It was difficult to be cut off from that.

After 2 hours of sleep, we heard banging at our window. Alemu was outside. He had received a phone call from the orphanage saying they had found the birthmother and that she would be at the orphanage until 10am. Of course, we sprang from the bed, threw some clothes on, ate on the run and began the 40 kilometer drive to Debre Zeit. We had to leave Mikias with the house care, which was also difficult. We have developed a relationship with these women and trust them though.

As we approached Debre Zeit, we tried to take video of the area. This is the area where Henock was born and lived at the beginning of his life. It was very similar to most of the villages we have seen this far. However, viewing it was different. It was hard not to think about what Mikias’ life would have been like when you know he is at a guest house in Addis preparing to come to the States with us.

Meeting the birthmother, Tizita, was an absolute wonderful and a moving experience. We were able to videotape our more than 20 minute conversation with her and felt a connection right away. She was able to, through translation, answer for us and more importantly, Mikias, questions about her life, her family and her situation. We also told her about us and gave her the opportunity to ask us any questions. We are extremely grateful for this conversation. At one point, she did tell us that we had her and the Lord’s blessing and that she considered us her family…unbelievable.

We were able to tour this orphanage as well. This was the orphanage that Henock was brought to by Tizita. It is connected with the one in Addis where we originally picked him up. Leaving Debre Zeit was difficult. Leaving Tizita was also difficult. We embraced for a long time. As we went to leave, she came back to the car and hugged me again. I will never forget that moment.

On our long drive back to Addis we were able to stop at another orphanage that Adoption Associates works with. We had saved half of our donations to deliver here and had packed them in a hurry this morning. This orphanage is relatively new and is much bigger than the other two we have seen. There were so many children. One section housed children ages 2 -10 and the other infants up to 2. We spent some time visiting the children and talking with the director. He was extremely grateful for all of the donations. He said at one point, that he found it “very encouraging”. Obviously, this was another wonderful and enriching experience.

Once we finally arrived back at the guest house it was nearly 2:30pm. We were more than exhausted. It was an extremely draining day. Thankfully, the women watched Mikias for a few more hours so that we could get some sleep. After our nap, we were/are still pretty exhausted, but had such a fulfilling day that we can’t complain. We were able to play and care for Mikias tonight and have already fed him twice. We are hoping all will go smoothly.

We hope tomorrow will be quieter. It is Embassy Day and one that will end with an entrance visa to the USA for Mikias. We received his pretty darn cute passport and birth certificate today, so we are on our way.

Another day in Addis Ababa

2007-06-12T16:44:00.000-04:00

Today was a very well balanced day. Not too rushed like some of the days have been. This morning started out a little rough (again). Mikias’ woke up at 4:30am and refused to go back to sleep. He was in a very good mood but both of us were so exhausted from the all the excitement of the last few days that we were not much in the mood for playing with him that early in the morning. We finally got him to go back to sleep around 7am so we slept as well…right through breakfast.

Most of the morning was spent at the guest house just hanging out and relaxing a bit. Alemu and Ben took a quick trip to the Ethiopian Airlines office to confirm our tickets for Friday’s flight. We were able to secure a front seat with a fold-down bassinette for Mikias. Big sigh of relief. The best news came when Gizesh (a guest house worker) turned the faucet in the bathroom and water came out!! This immediately made the rest of the day much easier. We will never take water for granted again.

This afternoon we hit the town with Alemu again. He took us to another market area because we were interested in purchasing some fabric. This market was much less chaotic than the Merkato and we got some great deals (with Alemu’s help of course). We discovered that children had been yelling “white person!” in Amharic at us as we drove down the street. Alemu finally clued us in on that one.

Then we stopped at the University Museum at Addis Ababa University. This was a great experience and we highly recommend this to all families making the trip here for upcoming adoptions. We learned a great deal about Ethiopian history and customs. The tour guide we had was very knowledgeable. This helped us understand a lot about the country and we hope to share some of this with Mikias when he grows up.

We made it home before today’s large rainstorm. This seems to occur in the afternoon every day now. We spent some more time at the guesthouse enjoying Mikias. We finally got our first family picture taken today. We realized that no one had taken a picture of the three of us since we got Mikias. Also, Joanna learned how to wrap Mikias to her back (see picture). This is a very common way to carry babies here. Gizesh and Hewot were able to help Joanna out a lot.

This evening we went with Alemu to a traditional Ethiopian restaurant about 20 minutes from here. It was fantastic traditional food and entertainment. We have had injera (Ethiopian bread) a few times in Michigan, but that was nothing like the injera here. This was much better. Throughout the entire meal there were various dances performed that represented the various regions of Ethiopia. Some of the dancing was simply unbelievable. We ended up recording quite a bit of video.

We are still trying to meet Mikias (Henock’s) birthmother while we are in the country. The orphanage director is trying to locate her but was unsuccessful today. We are hoping that she is located and we can meet her before we leave. When we do meet her we will travel to Debre Zeyt, just south of Addis. We will also have the opportunity to visit the orphanage in this town where Henock was originally brought. This all may happen as early as tomorrow.

Merkato Madness. No water, no problem

2007-06-11T16:04:00.000-04:00

Today was an interesting day as well. The new twist on things is that we woke up this morning and learned that there was no water at the guest house. Apparently, the surrounding area has been without water for a few days, but we just learned of it today since the guest house has a large water reserve tank that we were using. Ironically, there was a very large rainstorm today that allowed the house cook and maid to collect and then boil for everyone’s use. Alemu said that this has never happened since he has lived here…just our luck I guess. Our hiccup was Mikias deciding to pee all over himself and we had no way of giving him a bath because it was before the rainstorm. We improvised and those of you who will see our video will see firsthand the humor in this situation.

Nonetheless, we had a great day. In the morning, Alemu took us to the Merkato which is the largest open-air market in Africa. It was wild. It was basically like the market we visited yesterday multiplied by 20. Many more people, congestion, and sellers. We were interested in buying some clothing and little gifts, so Alemu took us to several vendors. Luckily he was there because every transaction involved some sort of heated argument about pricing. I think we ended up with some good deals thanks to Alemu’s negotiation skills. We only walked out on one vendor. Walking through the Merkato was quite an experience. Dodging cars, buses, donkeys, and people carrying huge sacks on their heads was stressful. Also, many people would just yell “You!” or “I love you!” at us. Maybe this was the only English they knew or maybe they really did love us. Many people would also try to get in the line of our cameras so they could get in our pictures. At one point, we walked around for 15 minutes with our video camera rolling at eye level just so we could give some sort of perspective.

After our Merkato escapade, we went to a local grocery store to stock up on formula and other items we’ll need to get us through the week and flight home. The rest of the afternoon was spent at the guest house. We were able to spend a lot of time playing with Mikias and settling our room down a bit (it looked like a bomb had gone off in there). As we said, there was a huge rainstorm in the afternoon. This is the beginning of the rainy season in Ethiopia that will last a couple months. Mikias was absolutely transfixed by all the rain falling from the sky.

This evening after dinner we began discussing with Alemu our upcoming Embassy appointment. Our visit to the U.S. Embassy on Thursday provides the entrance visa to get Mikias into the country this weekend. We need to provide documentation and forms for this process. Our discussion this evening left us both a little frustrated. There seems to be a disconnect between the AAI office back home and Alemu. We were under the impression that Alemu was going to help us complete some of these documents, but now we are left calling the Embassy ourselves in the morning to figure out exactly what we need. We’re sure it is just a miscommunication and that we’ll be able to get things straightened out.

We’ve probably got another busy day ahead of us tomorrow. We just hope the water comes back on at sometime to make our lives a little easier.

Hanging around in Africa

2007-06-10T23:24:00.000-04:00

Today was definitely an interesting day. First of all, last night with Mikias went much better than the first night. We’re a very efficient bottle-making machine now. If there was an Olymipic event that included mixing water and powder as quickly as possible after being awaken from a dead sleep I’m sure I’d be headed for a medal. It has been interesting trying to learn how to care for a baby while in a very foreign environment. Last night was good up until 4am. Mikias woke up and we gave him his bottle, but he refused to go back to sleep. He was in a very happy mood though, so we ended up just playing with him for a couple of hours instead of sleeping.

Alemu arranged a trip for us to a monastery that was about 2 hours (country roads) outside of Addis. He suggested that we not bring Mikias because we would be making several stops. So, Mikias had his first babysitters today (that didn’t take long). Gizesh and Hewot, the two women who work at the guesthouse watched him today. It was a little difficult leaving him, but we’re also in Ethiopia to gain knowledge of the culture and customs to share with him later. Seemed like the right thing to do. Of course having to explain Mikias’ care to these two women was interesting especially because of the language barrier and our lack of certainty.

We left at 8am and picked up two of Alemu’s nephews and one of his friends who came along with us. Once we drove out of Addis into the countryside we were just amazed. The landscape is beautiful and very mountainous. We stopped at a weekend market in a village along the way. This was a very cool, but intimidating experience. We obviously stuck out…if not for our “whiteness” then definitely for the “interested” crowd of people following us around. It was a bit nerve-wracking having people watch your every move. We walked around a bit and saw practically everything (donkeys, shoes, chickens, batteries, flour, nails, etc.) for sale. The market was somewhat of an organized chaos. After stepping around donkeys, over chickens and breaking away from the weird following, it was a relief to be back in the car.

From there we continued on to the monastery. It was located off the main road about 4 km on a dirt road which took us at least 15 minutes to travel. This again was a bit intimidating because we traveled through a very poor village filled with beggars and interested people waving and yelling at the car. Once we arrived, we spent some time viewing in and around the building including a 15 minute hike up a mountain to a cave. The elevation aided in making this a challenge.

On the 2 hour drive back to Addis, we stopped and had a late picnic style lunch. This essentially included us sitting in a manure-filled field alongside the road, swatting flies and choking down sandwiches. This was all witnessed by a few of our closest local friends (children) who surrounded the blanket to watch us eat. Alemu informed us that they most likely had never seen a white person. We have been carrying around little packages of candy wherever we go, so this was an example of where we gave them out. They were appreciative as noted by them chasing our car down the road as we left.

Once returning back to the guest house, we spent most of the time playing with and feeding Mikias. We’re hoping to get him to sleep a little longer tonight but who knows how that will turn out.

Our first night with Mikias

2007-06-09T16:32:00.000-04:00

“Knowing more” would have been helpful last night as we tried to figure out a feeding schedule for Mikias. We were told at the orphanage that he was fed formula “Nan” at the level of two for his age every 2 hours. Of course, Alemu hasn’t been able to find it at any of the local grocery stores so we are off on our own. We have been creating a schedule mostly dictated by Mikias’ cries and our own intuition (if you can call it that). We were also told that he was given cereal, but we don’t know in which form. As you can see, we are filling in a lot of blanks.

We hardly slept at all last night partly because Mikias needed our attention and partly from still not being on a regular local schedule. Okay, and partly because fixing a bottle out of a thermos gets a little old. All complaints aside, we gave him his first bath today. (Funny story to follow about how to give a bath in Ethiopia) This afternoon we went to the National Museum here in Addis and saw “Lucy” (the oldest human remains). We also went to St. George Orthodox Church and learned our Ethiopian religion history. As exciting as those latter two things were, we mostly just stared at each other in shock and kept saying “we are in Ethiopia” and what did we just do.

Addis Ababa is like something neither of us has seen before. Every time we leave the guest house we stare wide eyed at what is around us. The streets are filled with people and cars and even some animals. There are small blue vans everywhere. These are the local taxis and can have nearly 20 people jammed on them. I am sure our pictures won’t do justice to what we have seen. WOW!

Tonight Alemu took us to a pizza place. This was a nice break from all the food we have eaten thus far. It is good, just different. (Joanna’s stomach is not having fun, yet.)

Okay, we are dead tired and need to go to bed. Thank you for your thoughts!

And of course, here are a few more pictures of the boy.