Introducing Mikias Henock McKinney!!

In Benjamin’s words…

What a great day! We went to the Adera orphanage this morning to pick up our son. It was incredible. The orphanage was quite nice. We met with the director in his office for a few minutes and then a caregiver appeared holding our little boy. He was wearing the outfit we sent for him. Of course we both started crying right away. The first time I held him is definitely something I’ll always remember. Mikias smiled for Joanna almost immediately.

In Joanna’s words…

Wow! Does life get any better than this? The orphanage was amazing and Mikias is beautiful. When they placed him in my arms, he smiled and I melted. As I watched Benjamin hold him, I knew our lives would never be the same (for so many reasons). He was so well cared for! The nannies were all so wonderful, the director very warm and all of the staff very welcoming. We received a tour of the orphanage and were able to be with all of the children for a little bit. They sang to us and we sat in the middle of them. They kept kissing and hugging us. Leaving was difficult for many people, including us.

From both…

The rest of the day, we have spent trying to get to know Mikias and replaying this morning events. We have recapped the crazy, and I mean crazy, ride to the orphanage talking about everything we remember seeing. The roads were so busy with cars, people, animals and our driver only took out a couple of curbs. There was a man carrying this very wide basket on this head. Another man was herding his cattle along the highway and there were many people out and about just sitting in front of their stores. Not too mention, the roads were not even roads. They looked more like compacted mud hills that we had to navigate through.

Mikias has been a joy. It is really strange trying to figure out what a baby needs without having access to much. The orphanage sent us with one warm bottle and that is all we had for a bit. Alemu was able to get us formula for the meantime. We will worry about more of that later. It is interesting trying to find the house cook to boil water to let it cool down to prepare a bottle. The cook actually just gave us a thermos of hot water so that will help us make his bottles through the night. We put his first diaper on backwards and are nervous as all get out to try and bathe him in a shower that’s not the easiest to use.

We think we’ve figured out that Mikias must be able to distinguish familiar sounds or color very well. He seems to be comforted a little more by the workers at the guest house than by us. He’s getting used to us just like we’re getting used to him!

We’re not sure what tomorrow holds for us. We’ll have to talk to Alemu tonight about what the schedule is. We’re sure it can’t possibly be as thrilling as today, but you never know!

We're here

After many, many, many hours on a plane we have arrived in Ethiopia!! The plane ride from DC to Addis Ababa was very comfortable. We can't say the same for the trip from Detroit to DC...but that is all behind us now. We met a couple from Oregon on our flight that are also here adopting a son. We actually got their info and (maybe) will try to meet up with them while we're here. If not we at least have someone we can email with when we return to the States.

Alemu picked us up from the airport after we went through customs and obtained our visas to enter the country. We then came to the guest house (which is Alemu's own house) just about a mile from the airport. We just finished our dinner and are now enjoying bread that was baked for us as part of an Ethiopian tradition. The accommodations here are very nice. We've got our own room with a crib already ready for Henock.

We found out that we will be going to the Adera orphanage tomorrow to pick up Henock. Very exciting!!! It will be hard to sleep tonight for sure. Alemu also told us that the package we sent for Henock (on April 20th) just arrived yesterday. I guess we could have just brought the items ourselves. At least Henock is sleeping with our gifts for one night before we meet him tomorrow.

It sounds like all the donations we brought will be split between two orphanges so we can benefit the most children. I think we ended up with about 70lbs. of donations. We'll be a lot lighter coming back. Except I guess we'll have one more person with us!!

That's all for now. Goodnight everyone.

Anticipation

I am the type of person who likes to challenge myself. I am eager to research something. I am excited to start it, organize it and then be persistent enough to get to the point of no return. Then, I feel like I am going to puke. This is the point where I need the gentle nudge and the "pep talk". I am not going to jump off with both feet, but I will drag my foot on the ground until there is nothing left to do but fall off the cliff. Right now, I am hanging on by the nail of my toe and know that the edge is in sight.

We are ready, I think. At very least we are as ready as we are going to be considering we board the flight today and won't be back in our own bed until the night of June 16th.

Oh, the anticipation. We anticipate the flight. We anticipate the feeling of stepping on to a continent for which we have never seen. We anticipate meeting Henock. We anticipate holding Henock. We anticipate staring at him for hours. We anticipate seeing the orphanage, the kids, the poverty. We anticipate meeting his birth mother. We anticipate seeing our son's birth country and trying to remember everything we can. We anticipate the flight home (a lot). We anticipate going through customs on the way home. We anticipate seeing our families at the airport. I can't wait.

And although we anticipate much, we do not expect. Whatever happens after boarding this flight we know will forever change us. We are excited to even have this opportunity and have enjoyed the ride. Now, let's go bring this kid home!

Signing off from the States with joyful anticipation of signing on in Africa!

A wonderful surprise!

I wanted to take a moment and share a very moving experience I had this past week at school. Although I started the week "stressing" about how to get everything done, I ended the week feeling very comfortable that my students were left in good hands and that all would work out just fine. However, the surprise of the week came midway when I walked into the cafeteria after school on Wednesday to about 100 of my students yelling "surprise".

My student teacher had organized a surprise baby shower complete with pizza, pop, a 5 tiered cupcake tower, a very large poster card and so many gifts for Henock. It was amazing and I can't begin to tell you how moving an experience this was for me. I have thoroughly enjoyed sharing this entire adoption process with my students and can't begin to express my appreciation to them for their openness, enthusiasm and genuine interest in my life. Somewhere this school year between algebra equations and "geometry", a relationship outside of math grew and my adoption experience was enriched because of this. Here are a few pictures from a moment in my life greatly affected by some wonderful young people.

New Pictures

It's been a crazy week for both Joanna and I as we try to wrap things up with our jobs and start preparing for the big trip next week. On Wednesday we received new pictures of Henock. These were taken just this past weekend during Alemu's visit to the orphanage. Henock looks considerably older and larger now! According to the info we received he's gained about 1-1/2lbs since our last report. I'm not sure how much we trust the information, though, because it also said he is 1cm shorter than before...I'm no expert but I'm pretty sure this isn't possible.

This weekend we'll be spending most of the time filling out some last minute embassy forms, figuring out what to pack, and counting down the days and hours till our plane leaves

Happy 1/2 Birthday

Henock is 6 months old today. Happy Birthday to our little boy!

Running around!!!

If adoption is considered a marathon we are at about mile 20 with the finish line in sight. (That finish line just happens to be around the world.) Anyone that has run a marathon knows that at the 20th mile you start to wonder how in the world you are going to finish the last 6 miles. That sums up how I am feeling.

This weekend we made a very large "to do" list. It included both adoption and non-adoption things and was then broken down into pre and post travel. It was then broken down again into "urgent" and "hopefully we will get done". Although we were able to do quite a bit, I am still at the point where the list is out the window and get me on that plane!

We still have paperwork to get together for the Embassy. We still need to pack. I still need to wrap things up at school. But, most importantly, we still can't wait to meet our son.

P.S. Thought you might enjoy a few pictures of the baby's room. I think it turned out very well.

It's all happening so fast

You'd think after all that time waiting for a referral I would feel somewhat ready to travel and pick up our child, but I can't say that I feel that way. I'm kind of confused about what to do next. Obviously, there is the packing and preparation for travel. And of course we have to get ready to take care of our new son too. It kind of feels like I'm cramming for a big test in school or something....although this will turn out way better than that. So, we've made countless lists and I think we can actually pull this off.

This is definitely unlike getting ready for any other trip we've ever been on. I am so much more concerned about having all the necessary "supplies and equipment" for Henock than packing anything for Joanna or I. We will pick Henock up from the orphanage at the beginning of our trip, so we have to be prepared to take care of him the entire week we're there. Never having been a parent before, this seems like a daunting task. At the same time, we'll be able to get in plenty of practice in front of strangers before we ever have to parent in front of our family and friends back home. It will kind of be like a practice run!

Thursday our plane tickets and itineraries were waiting for us on our front porch when we got home from work. Our round-trip tickets were in the package, but also included were Henock's one-way tickets from Addis Ababa to Detroit. It was kind of cool to see his name printed on the tickets. I should also mention that if you're ever looking to travel to Ethiopia don't wait till two weeks before to make reservations...it's not the cheapest way to go. Of course we were expecting some sticker shock all along.

In other news, we heard that Alemu was visiting the orphanage again this weekend and will get updated pictures for us. We look forward to receiving those at the beginning of the week. Also, we should get some updated stats (length, weight) on Henock which will be useful to our pediatrician back here.

We booked our flights!!!

Today we received our travel dates! For once, we don't have to wait. As a matter of fact, we are leaving 8 days sooner than we thought! Our flights are booked. We leave out of Detroit on Wednesday, June 6th, and arrive the next night in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. That is 2 weeks from today!

We leave from Detroit and go to Washington D.C., where we board Ethiopian Airlines. This flight takes us through Rome to refuel and then off to Africa. We have the same pattern home. This is important as we won't have to get another visa for Henock because this is considered a direct flight.

If all goes as planned all three of us will land in the United States on June 16th. This is my dad's birthday. (Happy Birthday Grandpa!)

And of course, the 17th is Father's Day. What a wonderful gift for Benjamin!

First shower

Thank you so much to everyone who came to our shower yesterday...and for all the gifts you gave. We were so excited that you were able to join us. After loading all the new stuff into our place last evening, I told Joanna that I'm now convinced we need to move to a larger home! It makes me wish I would have finished the basement years ago. I think it will probably take all week to "organize" all the new gear. It has been fun going through everything and starting to set up Henock's room. I think it's definitely starting to look like a baby's room. Now we just need the baby! At least now we have what we need to get started. I know there is a post-travel baby shower also in the works that will be for my side of the family (and friends too).

I'd like to especially thank Elaine (Henock's new grandma) and Caroline (Henock's new aunt) for all the work they put in to running the shower yesterday. They were certainly busy all day, but everything turned out perfectly.

We were hoping to get some sort of update today about a more definite travel date, but we weren't contacted. So, we'll be following up with Kurt tomorrow about that. We'd like to be able to set up travel and make plane reservations this week.

It's official!

I got a call this morning from Kurt (our consultant) who heard from Alemu (the contact in Ethiopia). Everything went smoothly with yesterday's court proceedings. We are officially parents! No official word on when we'll travel, but Kurt is estimating that Alemu will want us to arrive in Ethiopia on June 15th. That's only four short weeks from tomorrow! We expect to have that all sorted out in the coming days.

We also received answers to a few questions we had. Most importantly, it sounds like we'll be able to meet the birthmother while we're there. We are very excited about this because of how much it will mean to Henock as he grows older. I'm sure it will be a very emotional experience.

Also, we should be receiving new pictures of Henock in the next few days. We'll be sure to share them here. I know some of you haven't seen the pictures of him we received with our referral, so here are a few pictures of our baby boy.

And the wait continues...

When we woke up this morning we anticipated knowing “something” by night’s end. This kind of day is the hardest part of the entire adoption experience. It is difficult not to have expectations about what a “big day” will bring and even more difficult to realize that the expectations you were trying to not have, you did indeed have, and that they were not met. So, the wait goes on…

It is amazing how you can manipulate the same 4 pictures, looking for something new, and just hope that he doesn’t change too much that by the time you see him you won’t be able to recognize him in a crowded orphanage. I think of him often and hope that he is being nourished well, cared for by loving hands, sleeping soundly and can feel the many thoughts that go out to him on any given day.

And the wait goes on….we hope for news tomorrow.

Tomorrow is a big day

Well, tomorrow is Henock's court date in Ethiopia. If all goes well (and we hope it does), I should get a call in the morning at work that the court process is complete. We talked to Kurt (our adoption consultant) tonight and he is optimistic that we will travel 4 weeks after the court date is complete. That means we're likely looking at traveling in mid-June sometime.

Once the court process is complete, Henock will be able to get his birth certificate and passport. All that will be complete by the time we arrive in Ethiopia. Incidentally, we discovered that, following in Ethiopian tradition, Henock's birth certificate will read "Henock Benjamin McKinney". How cool!! Ethiopians typically take their father's name as their last name. We do plan on changing his name once we're back in the U.S., but this will be his "official" name for a little while at least.

In our conversation with Kurt, we were able to find out a lot about the travel and we got answers to many of our questions. And we had a ton of questions!! We both feel more comfortable with everything now that we know what the next steps are. It's nice to finally be talking about travel. It seems like this has been a long time coming.

We'll let you all know how tomorrow goes!

Ethiopian adoption dinner

Happy Mother's Day to Joanna....and all mothers too of course.

Last night we drove over to Grand Rapids to meet 8 other couples that are also adopting from Ethiopia through our adoption adency, Adoption Associates. We met at Little Africa, a small Ethiopian restaurant. It was great to talk to people that are walking through the same process we are. One other couple also recently received their referral of a 6 month old boy. So, it was exciting to share some stories of the process so far. A lot of the couples had questions for us since many of them are just starting paperwork and doing their homestudies.

This will be such a remarkable group of people to stay in contact with as we all begin to bring our children home from Ethiopia. It will also be great if all our children can get together sometime in the near future too.

The Court Date is a Coming!

Two days ago we received the good news of when our court date is. This is the day that the adoption will be final and Henock will officially be our son. It is weird to receive a phone call that says "okay, May 16th is the day!"

On May 16th, we need everything to go smoothly. Three different parties will meet on our behalf to finalize the adoption. First, representatives from the orphanage will be there for Henock. They need to show documentation that he is indeed an orphan. Second, representatives from an Ethiopian governmental agency will provide all the necessary documents that say something to the effect that Ben and I are able to parent. (Well, it appears that way on paper) Finally, Alemu, our Ethiopian contact, and our power of attorney will be there on our behalf to handle all of the legalities of finalizing an adoption.

Now I need to tell you that there is a chance that all will not go smoothly. Our adoption agency has currently brought 3 children home from Ethiopia and of the three; two were delayed at this point. This is where I can insert a probability question...”according to past accounts, what is the likelihood of everything going smoothly?” I prefer to take the approach of my students and say “everything always works out, so why do we need this probability stuff, anyway?”

Anyhow, I do find it strange that on that day, I will probably be teaching some Algebra lesson while around the world an Ethiopian judge whose name I probably can’t pronounce will be changing our lives somehow. Either she or he will extend the wait and therefore tease us a little longer or will send us on a flurry to find the quickest flights to a country that our son is now residing in. Well, whatever happens on that day will still put us one step closer to bringing Henock home….and that is what we want!

First Entry

Finally, we’ve got this adoption blog up and running. This is something that we’ve wanted to do for a while now. Really our idea was to be able to easily keep everyone updated on our adoption process. As we’ve been going through this process over the past 9 months it’s been hard to keep track of who knows what. This should help. In addition, we hope to provide information about adoption in general and the entire process. It has been fulfilling to us that so many people have expressed genuine interest in the progress of this adoption. It has been difficult at times to share little moments of joy, frustration, or excitement along the way because most of our friends and family aren’t familiar with how it all works. At the same time, it’s been rewarding to expose so many people to international adoption.

After deciding to pursue adoption through Ethiopia in July 2006, the process has involved months of education seminars, reading, home study interviews, fingerprints, writing large checks, collecting dossier paperwork, document notarization, medical exams, vaccinations, and (worst of all) waiting. And waiting. And waiting. After all of this we finally were given our referral on April 4. We received pictures and a brief medical record of our new son, Henock. We were told that he was approximately 5 months old. At the time, the adoption agency did not know his exact birth date and their information was an estimate based on a pediatrician’s medical evaluation. We were (and still are, of course) thrilled to be matched with a child so young. Based on previous Ethiopian adoptions through Adoption Associates, we were thinking our child would be close to a year old when we received them.

Last Monday, we received additional information from our agency. We were emailed what looks like paperwork Henock’s birthmother filled out when she brought him to the orphanage. The 3-page form includes the birthmother and birthfather’s names, Henock’s actual birth date (11/29/06), and information about why he was brought to the orphanage in February. We feel very fortunate to have this information. It is a lot more than most adoptive parents receive. While there is joy in having this information, there is also sadness in knowing why Henock is available for adoption. What an unbelievably difficult time this must be for the birthmother. What a brave decision to entrust her own son to the care of others that he might have a brighter future. And how lucky we are to be part of that decision.

Currently, we are waiting for a court date to be assigned to Henock’s case in Ethiopia. On the court date, our lawyer in Ethiopia will be present along with representatives from the orphanage and governmental agency that handle international adoption. If everything goes smoothly, the adoption will be final on that day. Before we even meet our son! We will then make arrangements to travel to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia to pick Henock up. We’ll definitely post updates as we continue to walk through this process.

In a nutshell, that’s where we are with everything. I hope in the coming weeks and months we’ll continue to post comments and elaborate a little more about how things are going. Thanks everyone for your support so far…we’ll continue to need it.